1. Lembit Opik will be involved in a front-page scandal.
Since he's already predicted something similar himself, this isn't much of a surprise. Nevertheless, Guido is 1-0 ahead.
2. Following a surge to the SNP in local elections the Conservatives will finally move away from Unionism and towards spinning off Scottish and Welsh sister parties as part of their localism agenda.
Scottish local elections held under PR for the first time, meaning everyone (including Tories) wins seats in areas that used to be barren for them and proclaims a surge. However, Cameron makes announcement anyway, because it will wind up the old guard and make him look fresh. Guido is 2-0 and crowing.
3. Multiple charges will be brought against Downing Street characters in the Loans for Lordships scandal. Evidence of profiteering by Labour donors with government contracts awarded in dubious circumstances will surface. The fall-out will be politically devastating for Labour.
Multiple charges are brought against minor characters who no-one has heard of. Devastation occurs among political classes, but the general public fails to be impressed as they already believed all politicians are crooks anyway and it can't be that bad because Blair wasn't charged. Guido claims to be at 3-0, but not everyone is convinced.
4. Informal Tory approaches will be made to leading LibDem figures as to discussions on the shape of the future governing coalition.
And leading Lib Dems, who all believe that Cameron will implode before the election and that Osborne isn't capable of adding up his own pocket money, let alone operate as Vince Cable's boss, tell the Tories to piss off. A week later Guido drops Delphic hints about the story, which the Times expands into a front page lead. Guido, at 4-0, announces plans for a range of Order Order action figures, body splash and tea towels.
5. New Media outlets will start to go mass market, disrupting the established politico-media nexus and terrifying old media owners.
Guido gets invited to more parties and award ceremonies, declines to take part in "I'm a Celebrity", declares a 5-0 clean sweep and global dominance, and is accepted as a fully paid-up, sold-out member of the established politico-media nexus. Iain Dale responds by competing in "Strictly Come Dancing", finishing third.
Don't know anything about 1 or 2, but I think you're correct on 3. Of course 4 will happen (probably already has happened). There will be no paper trail around it though. I think I know what you mean by 5, but you couldn't be a bit more specific about what you mean by "New Media outlets". Sorry about the serious tone of this comment - you started it.
ANDY a feather in your nose is all you need to fly that’s right Dumbo fly fly!!! Lib Dems who all believe that Cameron will implode. Pah!!
They also believe you can be a tax cutting benefit increasing Libertarian law and order party. What’s more they blame the frequent embarrassment of their local parties adopting diametrically opposed views on a” Liberal " decentralised structure . In other words this is not a party at all but a loose confederation of opportunists and show boaters. History shows the folly of getting into bed with them and I`m not talking about Straight Choice Hughes .Guido has been counting ,on his pudgy fingers , specifically the ICM poll showing a pact would be needed to form a government. Not after the boundary commission my politically myopic chum and also not after Browns move to the centre destroys Labour in the Celtic Fringe . What’s more not after the devastation of the Supply side wrecking and the chasm in Broons sums bubble malodorously to the surface .
I have a prediction
1 Broon : first 100 days . He will offer to scrap inheritance tax . Credit to Nick Drew on for the logic and maths in the George during intensive ”Putting the world to rights work”
2 Cameron will continue steady as she goes with no commitments to hard policy despite wails of schoolboy mass debaters ( Have this from a source who would know ).Tory plans are to stay vague a further 12 months .(Its working)
3 Blair will fuck off with a young tasty sauce pot . He doesn’t need her money any more or the “image”
4The growth of the new right will pile intelligently timed pressure on Cameron and the second the good ship Tory is safely docked in the harbour of state UP GOES THE JOLLY ROGER RUN RUN YOU LIBERAL SCUM BAGS RUN AS THE RAIN OF FIERY TAX CUTS POURS ONTO YOUR COSY MEDIA HOUSE OF STRAW!!!
BBC Dead !
Yummy and Marr on toast is still on the menu run like a rat though he may
December 30, 2006 at 2:52 PM
Anonymous
said...
Old Bore's Almanac:
Although Yates managed to nail some of the smaller fry, Teflon Tony get off yet again, although, like O.J. Simpson, everyone believes him to be guilty. After Blair resigns, Murdoch ofers him a lucrative deal to publish his autobiography entitled: "How I would have sold honours for cash if I had ben guilty of doing it."
After Ming experiences a number of "senior moments", he is ousted in a coup. This comes as a shock to Ming who didn't realise he was leader of the LibDems.
December 30, 2006 at 3:08 PM
Anonymous
said...
Guido fully expects to be right on the majority of his predicitions...
You didnt predict somebody nicking your bike in 2006 did you?
My one wish (as these are obviously wishes not predictions) is for the BBCs extortion funded model to go when analogue broadcasts are switched off, and the only TV broadcasts are digital, and thus subscription.
Something without mass cannot implode. It can however easily fade away.
December 30, 2006 at 4:00 PM
Anonymous
said...
I cough the job , I think the BBC offers great value for money , plenty of waste and many members of staff should be sent to a re-education camp , however, its great value for money. They fucking sacked that cunt noel edmunds so they cant be all bad.
December 30, 2006 at 4:14 PM
Anonymous
said...
I think Ive discovered what Tony will be doing ...
Wing Commander BBC1 Sun 31 Dec, 12:15 am - 1:50 am 95mins
Blair, a fighter pilot, joins an interstellar war to fight the evil Kilrathi who are trying to destroy the universe. [Chris Roberts, 1999][S]
1. Jan 2007 - Pai Mei (=P Mandelson) teaches Dave the five point palm-exploding heart technique during The Tory leader's 3rd secret Brussels visit to the old matelot 2. Brown a shoo-in March 2007 after T Blair's ticker explodes following a short scuffle with Cameron doing a Heseltine with the mace 3. Late March - Snap election called by Gordo for June 4. June - Balls increases rectal probe voltage to 11 but it's all too late & Broon loses snap election, resigns and is snapped up by The Unity Bank 5. July - Dave stands on the portal to No 10 in a Groundhog Day moment from 1st May 1997 and... 6. September - Lady T reaches the top of the Dead Pool list and finally drops off her perch
December 30, 2006 at 4:37 PM
Anonymous
said...
I can add to prediction number 3. That large consultancies had "embedded" consultants (i.e. salesmen) inside most of the Government department who took turns allocating multi-million pound contracts.
December 30, 2006 at 4:38 PM
Anonymous
said...
Fuck all this - I'm gonna watch The Arse on Sky.
December 30, 2006 at 5:04 PM
Anonymous
said...
I would like to make my top 5 predictions.
1) That they will find the number of foreign born prisoners has tripled under New Labour (according to my cousin who runs a well known prisoner charity), and that Gordon Brown has not funded new prisons or probation services and he has allowed dangerous criminals on the street because the waves of new prisoners have pushed them out. Gordon is trying to privatise the probation service to escape blame for not protecting the public.
2) That Gordon Brown has issued over 820,000 National Insurance Cards (that give free access to schooling and health care) without any checks being made. According to my Uncle who runs a branch of the Treasury.
3) That Gordon Brown has given many, mny billions to large accounting, software, legal, weapon consultancies who has allowed a systemic oligopoly at the heart of most Government departments - whereby consultants (salesmen) work permanently "helping" the ministers to allocate contracts to which Gordon pays without question - according to a friend who works for Microsoft in such a job.
4) That figure will emerge showing that Gordon Brown has allocated more money to New Labour heartlands than has previously been admitted. This will lead to a rise in the number of people calling for an English Parliament - and that politicians will ignore it.
5) That Gordon Brown's inflation figures will come under increasing scrutiny as being an irrelevant measure of inflation. As the world economy continues to grow - and be held back by limited resources, with consequential increases in inflation and interest rates his boasts that he decided to form the BofE committee will become sullied as both they and Gordon argue about who is responsible for defining what inflation is. Rates will be at least 1% higher at the end of the year, with the first .25% rise coming in February. Gordon will blame everybody but himself for the rise in inflation.
1. Broon goes for a snap election in 2007 to wrong-foot Cameron 2. Levy is fingered, but splits on Blair (nasty) 3. Slotgob ditches Tone a la Jowells to cling to her grubby HR trade. 4. UKIP gain first seat in HoC
December 30, 2006 at 5:20 PM
Anonymous
said...
"Gordon will blame everybody but himself."
Preposterous. The man is a saint; our saviour; our shining beacon in our hour of need. What's more, HE IS ALWAYS RIGHT.
December 30, 2006 at 5:27 PM
Anonymous
said...
My money is on Brown shaking up how the Government governs.
Whole Departments to be side-lined while his *mates* take executive charge (and fat pay cheques)
He is determined to embed his ideology and he knows he has little time before he is booted out.
December 30, 2006 at 5:32 PM
Anonymous
said...
One final prediction British Airways will mirror New Labour - their share price will be heading south for a long time to come.
I just got off the plane from Oslo with the family - "Fast Bagdrop" was taking 20 minutes per-person. The check in attendant was rude. The food on the plane was stale. The wine was vinegar. It took an hour and a quarter to get our bags at Heathrow because BA hadn't bought enough tractors - so they left the bags in the rain. Bloody Awful. That was club class! The board deserves the same fate as Blair and Brown et.al.
'spinning off Scottish and Welsh sister parties as part of their localism agenda.'
didn't realise there was anything left to spin off. but good luck to the .... anyway
December 30, 2006 at 5:37 PM
Anonymous
said...
How did you know me game plans for those corrupt coonts guido?
If the tories have any sense they will steer well clear of approaching those dishonest shytes at rent boy, homo HQ. Next year I will be mainly vestigating the Lib Dems, a few stories bubbling away about senior figures.
December 30, 2006 at 5:38 PM
Anonymous
said...
1. Stagflation in US. 2. Global slowdown, borrowing and taxes up in UK. 3. Brown unable to call early election because NuLab bankrupt. Soldiers on widely rumbled as Tax and Waste Chancellor. 4. Bhownagree tops himself. 5. George Galloway calls for National Day of Rememberance for his late friend Mr S Hussain.
December 30, 2006 at 5:47 PM
Anonymous
said...
I predict that if Blair or his cronies get any of their collars felt, the look of panic and terror on Blair,s face will be worth waiting to see. I don,t think, he could muster the same sense of control that Saddam showed, even at his own hanging. Saddam might have been an evil bastard and certainly deserved to hang but at least he wasn,t a shallow bastard, unlike our own glorious leader.
December 30, 2006 at 5:47 PM
Anonymous
said...
Surely one of the most corrosive effects of this wreched mendacious Government has been the fact people seem to allow more or less any behaviour having given up on politicians. If so many voted for these filth despite the lies surrounding the case for war & the treatment of Dr Kelly, they wont really give two hoots about Government contracts for cash.
December 30, 2006 at 5:48 PM
Anonymous
said...
General election - May 2007.
Brown pours money into NHS and states what a hero he is.
The price of Bricks & Mortar crash by 40% creating economic mayhem, followed by the Stock Market.
Terrorism escalates to unparalleld levels in the aftermath of Saddam.The World becomes increasingly a no go area.
The General Election produces a hung Parliament following a low turnout after the Electorate shows its contempt for Polititians.
Its Goodbye to Gay Boy Dave Cameron,as he resigns after a major slice of traditional Tories and the Right wing fail to offer that margin of support for that winning streak.
The Tories commence another spring clean of the Party and a bloodletting as to what went wrong.
UKIP and the BNP along with the GREEN PARTY celebrate a handful of MPs.
A Balance of Payments crisis is recognised as serious, as Tesco/Wal Mart etc are vilified for bringing tens of thousands of containers of crap and tat into the country from China and the Far East,which is tantamount to selling the UK Family silver.
Immigration rises to unprecedented levels.
The Euro shows signs of breaking as the Germans indicate a return to the Mark.
The US influence in the world falls as the crisis in the Middle East takes a turn for the worse and N Korea and Iran poke fun at the weakend and enfeebled US.
The Temperature averages around the World rise rapidly as global warming increases with the growth in the eastern world economies.
December 30, 2006 at 5:58 PM
Anonymous
said...
"Dr" Crackers (failed) said ... 4. Bhownagree tops himself.
Not before I've milked my public sector pension dry (indexed-linked, don't you know?)
Tory Commentator: Quite the little ray of sunshine, aren't we?
Gamma ray, more like.
December 30, 2006 at 6:08 PM
Anonymous
said...
Brown's first major announcement will be the removal of the NHS from central Government control. A fairly ruthless and utterly shameless attempt to break the connect people have of him being at the forefornt of shaping the state it's in today. That will buy him the two years he needs.
2007 may well see real disaffection surfacing with Dave from the right wing of the party, & why not.
How did we end up with a Blair clone when the era of believing in nothing but the value of presentation, is shamefully closing.
Brown will ruthlessly expose Dave's lack of gravitas, or force him to state his positions. When people know what you stand for they find it much easier to write you off, ask Ming the Mong.
Kennedy's coming back to be all things to all bummers, i mean people. People like to vote for you when they've no flippin' idea what you stand for.
No danger of the Blessed Margaret snuffing it in 2007. She is quite frankly indestructible. Guido, once the Lib Demmers raise the question of Proportional Representation, what does the Tory side do? Quietly acquiesce to the possibility of a permanent Lib-Lab governing coalition at Westminster. 'don't think so....
December 30, 2006 at 6:17 PM
Anonymous
said...
Bhownagree Have you deliberately fucked up a "Brownagree" moniker for some (to you) "humorous" reason know only to yourself, or are you just as fucking stupid as the queen of Kirkaldy?
December 30, 2006 at 6:41 PM
Anonymous
said...
Thank goodness you're back - I was beginning to fear a future entirely defined by Hitchen's shitting girlfriends and middle east obsessed political fantasists.
December 30, 2006 at 7:03 PM
Anonymous
said...
De predictions from de suburbs man is better dan yours:
Arsenal win de champions league at a canter;
TB is indicted once 'e leaves office;
Dave de hoodie shows 'is intelligence an resists revealin de election winnin policies too early;
GB reveals dat ten years as chancellor 'as exhausted im an can't think wot to do (especially cos de Tories is playin der cards close to der bras);
De Lib Dems slump in de polls;
De stock market 'as one good month, de January, an den..............!
All I'd want to see is that smug, self-serving wanker Drayson investigated over Powderject, his £50,000 investment in Labour which yielded him a £32m government contract and his subsequent £500,000 donation from that to Labour which earned him a peerage. Surely, SURELY that is worth some close scrutiny by Yates and his fellow inquisitors?
Go on Yates, just a few questions on Drayson to Ruth Turner and to Levy while you've got them both in custody ...
December 30, 2006 at 8:01 PM
Anonymous
said...
Mr Hitchens
What a tiresome oaf you are, to be sure. I am here to set the record straight concerning the Right Honourable Gordon Brown, our future PM and a man of vision and integrity. Come the hour ...
You, on the other, do not even qualify as pond-life. Am I wrong in thinking that you used to post here as PhoneCamFoolery, or was he just another racist bigot with Tourette's Syndrome?
December 30, 2006 at 8:06 PM
Anonymous
said...
You, on the other, do not even qualify as pond-life. Am I wrong in thinking that you used to post here as PhoneCamFoolery, or was he just another racist bigot with Tourette's Syndrome? Fuck off you fat deluded queer
December 30, 2006 at 8:35 PM
Anonymous
said...
Is Yates investigating just cash/loans for honours or is he looking into all iffy payments? The late 19th century provided some really catch-all legislation in the younger and wilder days of capitalism. Public Bodies and Corrupt Practices Act is a good one, still on the books.
Gordon might not like that one at all.
December 30, 2006 at 8:37 PM
Anonymous
said...
Because neither Brown nor Blair nor any other NuLab fuckwit minister can run a corner shop, they have had to employ KPMG to tell them the time of day and have had to appoint serial shysters like Robinson Drayson and Evans to posts/quangos. BrownBlair and co have no discernment in the business world hence they are being shafted(and by definition us as well) by Drayson and others. This incompetence is the real tragedy of being governed by corrupt fuckwits.
Enjoying the ads for off-shore trusts. Was it a barter arrangement, Guido? As for Bhownagree is he really one of us or does he enjoy flak?
December 30, 2006 at 8:56 PM
Anonymous
said...
It is with regret that I announce the death of Mr P. Hitchens, at 8.27 this evening. Further details here. No flowers, please, cash donations only to his widow.
The post attributed to him at 8.35 is obviously a malicious forgery.
Bhown agree I have been accustomed to imagining you as a refugee from a bygone world of entertainment , a retired chorus boy perhaps .Most entertaining if you enjoy a dollop of pathos in your sweet cordial. I `m afraid the T has floated from your Widow Twanky routine this eve though.
Shame.
Pond Life ..tut tut how very very very coarse
December 30, 2006 at 9:46 PM
Anonymous
said...
I find it very unlikely that Hitchens has/ had a wife. Surely not even a incontinent bit of filth would marry him?
December 30, 2006 at 9:49 PM
Anonymous
said...
Prediction:
If someone does go down for the "loans for honours" business (ie if Goldsmith cannot be persuaded to order the case dropped) then they will be charged with offences which do not directly implicate Bliar.
Saddam was tried and hung for ordering the deaths of 148 Shia Iraqis and not for his use of chemical weapons and other crimes which may have caused embarrassment to a certain D Rumsfeld, presidential envoy to Iraq during the early 1980s.
December 30, 2006 at 9:58 PM
Anonymous
said...
Conservatives make more gains in local elections.
Brown to become most unpopular new PM in history.
Cameron's sceptics to finally realise they are on a winner.
Thank you, thank you, PH, for giving me the chance to point out that there's a "c" in 'Kirkaldy'.
December 30, 2006 at 10:14 PM
Anonymous
said...
Surely not even a incontinent bit of filth would marry him? ....
Surely an imposter.This is just depressing witless and dull. Don`t bother with it PHITCH.
Bhownagree is funny. This is a tedious prat.
December 30, 2006 at 10:33 PM
Anonymous
said...
"Bhownagree" at 9:49 said "I find it very unlikely that Hitchens has/ had a wife. Surely not even a incontinent bit of filth would marry him?"
1. I did not make this post. Accept no substitutes! 2. The second sentence is not a question, but an assertion, and requires a full stop. I am often guilty of typographical error, but such a solecism, perpetrated in my name, demands exposure.
Mr Newmania - I said he did not qualify as pond-life, so cannot with justice be accused of coarseness.
The comments in this blog are often libellous and I wonder that Google has not been complained to or moved to act. Free speech is one thing, but ignorant and prejudiced ranting is quite another.
Mr Praguetory -- What do you mean by "one of us"? Do you mean the narrow-minded and mean-spirited clique who come here to expectorate? I am not one of "you", then; rather, I see it as my duty to hold up a mirror in which your collective visages, in all their spiritual ugliness, may be descried.
Ah me, what has happened to the English? At one time the middle classes engaged in polite and reasoned debate. We did not find it necessary to shout at one another, or swear like fishwives, or resort to ad hominem attacks.
If I poke fun at you, provoke and exaggerate, it is because it is so irresistibly easy to do.
December 30, 2006 at 10:39 PM
Anonymous
said...
yes bhown Fuck of you twat! leave my ex almost husband out of this. Peter Hitchens died this evening , show some respect you low life. I dont know what I shall do with myself. Any suggestions boys? (+;
December 30, 2006 at 10:41 PM
Anonymous
said...
I'm no daft.
And therefore,since I cannot prove a lover, To entertain these fair well-spoken days,-- I am determined to prove a villain, And hate the idle pleasures of these days. Plots have I laid, inductions dangerous, By drunken prophecies, libels, and dreams, To set young Dave Cameron and the Ming In deadly hate the one against the other:
I might call a snap election next year, but only if I'm as sure as I can be I'll win. Since like every new prime minister I'll get a honeymoon popularity bounce, and if the election is called soon enough, the Tories, lumbered with a second-rate apprentice Blair and no policies, will offer up a landslide to myself.
The LibDems will never make a pact with Tories, and after my landslide I won't need them.
I know what you mean Praguetory but if Mr. B`s motives for enticing the boys to be nasty to him are not entirely un-mixed, I `m sure we can allow him his private pleasures. For how long will this happy state of personal immorality be allowed to persist . I read only today of a new twist in the evil Nu lab knot . CCTV for the home! Of the worlds 4,000,000 units we have a prodigious 20% already and now , aching with feigned sanctimony they wish to protect citizens in danger of abuse …they say. In whose opinion and when will self abuse be equally spied upon. At this point I suspect Bhownagree to tap timorously on the door and with a trembling lip seek admission to our enlightened band of brothers .
There is a blue rosette for you old B and the dimly lit mirror will show your ravaged features well .
December 30, 2006 at 11:19 PM
Anonymous
said...
Thank goodness you're back, Peter Hitchen.
Happy New Year.
Tell the bloody Blair Clan to stay with the fucking Gibbs.
When I think what fuss there was about a a few innocent questions and a bundle of fivers here and there....oh so many years ago.
December 30, 2006 at 11:24 PM
Anonymous
said...
Brown will not call a snap election - Labour backbenchers want to go the full term so they can claim their full pensions, they know they will be losing their seats, so GB will have to dance to their tune.
December 30, 2006 at 11:26 PM
Anonymous
said...
Whoops !!
Sorry Peter I forgot the s on the end of your surname.
Hello Peter Hitchens, Happy New Year.
December 30, 2006 at 11:29 PM
Anonymous
said...
JUDITH-Brown will not call a snap election
No but he will want to go before the boundary commission boosts the Blues by forty seats and the "Scottish problem" ends the Labour party as a serious prospect for governement forever. They have embroiled the boundary changes in some Balls related enquiry. Thats the key and on 40% with a fair seat allocation we can "PREPARE FOR GOVERNMENT"
He can`t wait the full term
(Didn`t a Liberal say "Prepare for Governement" once..as a joke obviously
December 30, 2006 at 11:39 PM
Anonymous
said...
Bhownagree said... Mr Praguetory -Ah me, what has happened to the English? At one time the middle classes engaged in polite and reasoned debate. We did not find it necessary to shout at one another, or swear like fishwives, or resort to ad hominem attacks. 10:39 PM
I think that the middle classes still do but any class can get internet access nowadays.
December 30, 2006 at 11:48 PM
Anonymous
said...
Judith, Brown WILL call a snap election if he's sure he can win, and if he does that Labour backbenchers will not be losing their seats. They'll love him.
And Windmill Dave will be out in the cold....
December 30, 2006 at 11:55 PM
Anonymous
said...
I didn't die this evening, I've been brain dead for years.
December 31, 2006 at 12:50 AM
Anonymous
said...
I hear Doughty Street is moving up a gear in January, that looks to be easily the main contender for point 5. Hasn't been mind-blowing yet but they're still tinkering with it - think of the potential.
We all know about 18DS plans. Guido's got to mean more than that though - I think number 5 is Guido's punt. Even without being able to name specifics, I think it's a reasonable call.
December 31, 2006 at 1:30 AM
Anonymous
said...
Guido's punt? He's up shit creek without a paddle(+;
December 31, 2006 at 1:43 AM
Anonymous
said...
A new hope; Dave's been reading Guido
Brown cast as Labour's 'dark side' http://www.guardian.co.uk/uklatest/story/0,,-6312744,00.html
December 31, 2006 at 2:32 AM
Anonymous
said...
DC: "2007 will be the year that Labour's dark side comes to the fore."
December 31, 2006 at 3:32 AM
Anonymous
said...
I'm with you on 2, 3, and 4, but not 5. YOu've been teasing us with #1 for months now.
New media isn't so new anymore, and unless you can totally OWN coverage of a new and important breaking scandal, your numbers (along with other political bloggers) will increase steadily but not to enough of an extent to actually cut into any meatspace media's profit margins. Eventually they'll all go online, it's true, but this thought doesn't terrify them, they just think it's going to happen later rather than sooner.
December 31, 2006 at 6:45 AM
Anonymous
said...
http://www.sundaymirror.co.uk/news/tm_headline=reid-to-take-on-gordon-&method=full&objectid=18356611&siteid=62484-name_page.html REID TO TAKE ON GORDON 'EXCLUSIVE' By Vincent Moss Political Editor JOHN Reid will this week deliver his clearest hint yet that he is ready to take on Gordon Brown for the Labour leadership after Tony Blair quits.
December 31, 2006 at 6:45 AM
Anonymous
said...
David Cameron will holiday with Paris Hilton leaving Steve Hilton facing litigation for impersonation
December 31, 2006 at 8:35 AM
Anonymous
said...
18DS is smug chattering class tellie for beltway folks. It fails to connect with the ordinary working people DC rightly identifies as critical to the NuCons success. Sad to say TM an ID are not natural presenters and it shows - painfully. 18DS needs to (and could)be more than an ego-wank for self selecting self-regarding political class tossers. It needs to be more accessible, more controversial and more self confident. More Nick Ferrari/Richard Littlejohn/Fox TV than the dull dull dull worthy crap it streams to an audience of erm hundreds...
December 31, 2006 at 9:55 AM
Anonymous
said...
I worry about the teas time for Teddy bears atmosphere on 18 D street in which Telly Tubby brain Rachel fits snuggly. The Conservative Party is abandoning its working class support. There may be few votes and fewer seats but with nothing but Liberal salad drizzled with a light environmental vinaigrette its all a little tasteless
The soul of the Party is with the “forgotten decents”. The working class mean and women who marry and work despite the states endless attack .Who see their idle neighbours out earning them who watch their BMW`s park at night and live with their nocturnal drug fuelled life styles. These are our friends in need , these and the heroic leaseholders bivouacked in the dangerous border territory. Surcharged and doctrinally abused .Perhaps the Dale pretence that you can like someone who talks crap should be dropped..
December 31, 2006 at 10:52 AM
Anonymous
said...
More terror attacks in UK will force Bliar's hand this year Attacks against US interests in the UK will scupper his already badly tarnished rep in the great satan.
Insolvencies will come home to roost for G Brown this year, being PM wont help him. Parts of the economy will go into serious reverse, retail, considered purchases etc. Peter H will be filmed bumming Opik
Long live the Iraqi resistance.
December 31, 2006 at 11:18 AM
Anonymous
said...
Opic is too old for my taste, I prefer going to Spain and Sweden where the age of consent is 12(+;
>The comments in this blog are often libellous and I wonder that Google has not been complained to or moved to act. Free speech is one thing, but ignorant and prejudiced ranting is quite another.
Do grow up ffs.
People like you are whats wrong with this country.
"I dont like what the nasty man said, I want something done about it".
Why don't you switch off your computer, put it back in its box and stick to reading newspapers?
December 31, 2006 at 12:08 PM
Anonymous
said...
gordon's strangely brown: This is old news. You obviously have not read on my blog where I announced weeks ago that I was prepared to take on Gordon Brown in a leadership contest.
December 31, 2006 at 12:10 PM
Anonymous
said...
I note Im being cloned by hirst the granny basher, carry on stalking me hirst I would love to report you to the police for harassment and get you recalled to jail (+: I know you aren't very bright, but try and understand, anything you do on that pc of yours is permanently logged
December 31, 2006 at 12:22 PM
Anonymous
said...
Damn, Hitchens, you shouldn't have warned JHL. I was really hoping he'd hang himself, given enough rope. My prediction for 2007 is JHL going back to prison.
BNP does rather well in the local elections after more Labour/establishment types bleat on about their rise. More pressure to ban the BNP from the "chattring classes."
Hitchens we all know "Hitchins" postings are made by the unrepentent Old Lady killer. FFS do not acknowledge this slimebag's existence. His current minor celebrity bought with an Old Lady's blood seems to give him no end of smug satisfaction. Do not engage with this vermin posturing as a member of the human race.
December 31, 2006 at 1:55 PM
Anonymous
said...
The Stevens Report into the crash in Paris. Easy to take apart. Here http://rigorousintuition.ca/board/viewtopic.php?t=9454&start=60
Happy New Year Guido and commentariat!
John
December 31, 2006 at 2:03 PM
Anonymous
said...
1 Blair secretly rewarded for his part in the biggest theft in history: viz; the transfer of funds from the American taxpayer and holders of US dollars to US army, contractors and other such filth. Also, rewarded for enabling the theft of huge quantities of oil from Iraq (US$700 million / month). All done under the pretense of war.
2 Saddam - I was Churchill's double - Hussein will be spotted in Georgia; photographed etc but no one will belief the evidence. The neocon created reality will continue uninterrupted. Any detractors will be dismissed as cranks.
3 Brown's economy will crash due to a house price fall, followed by interest rate rise (ie fractional reserve works both ways). No one will put two and two together and realise that not including house prices in inflation is directly responsible for huge money expansion. (As is, of course, fiat currency but ...) The pieces will thus remain in place for a repeat performance in a few years time.
4 In short, business as usual. UK political sensibilities defined by the catch phrase, "I'm not boffered."
My predictions for the New Year are that Parliament will pass legislation to allow all convicted prisoners the postal vote. And, that the Tories will continue to be a weak opposition.
My fans will be pleased to hear that I will be returning to prison to give lectures, as my good friend the Director General of the Prison Service, Phil Wheatley has asked me, and the pay's good aswell!
I suppose it is the price of fame being in demand for the good work I have done in the area of prison reform.
peter hitchens: As you say, an IQ of 155 is not very bright. If you got your head out of your arse the world would look brighter. Only a real person can suffer harrassment, not some figment of your imagination and only exists in the unreal world of the blogosphere. You get me recalled? That only happens when someone is a genuine risk to the public, ie, a link to the index offence. Keep taking the tablets, you may get better soon. Happy New Year.
December 31, 2006 at 3:01 PM
Anonymous
said...
I certainly agree with most of these, particularly No 5 as I have been following the US experience and we usually follow their lead.
Happy New Year to you Guido, it was great meeting you earlier this month. Onward and upward, I say. I hope Lembit will give us a few more laughs.
December 31, 2006 at 3:22 PM
Anonymous
said...
Brown will sweep into power an announce that all tax allowances are to be means-tested and available only to Scottish single mothers with unemployed parents.
A new army of 5-a-day outreach coordinators will be hired to visit families in disadvantaged areas of Glasgow and distribute citrus fruit. After the scheme becomes a success it will be rolled out nationally.
Smoker re-education camps will be opened throughout England. People smoking in semi-enclosed areas such as bus stops will be forced to spend their weekends looking at PowerPoint presentations of black lungs being dissected and smelling jars of wet dog-ends.
Tax on alcohol will be doubled and all 'buy 2 glasses get the bottle free' offers will be made illegal. High-Volume Drinking Awareness Outreach Coordinators will be given powers to enter residential premises at any time of the day in order to establish how many units you have consumed that week and distribute literature to promote awareness into issues surrounding binge-drinking where appropriate.
Drivers will be required to have a government GPS system fitted to their cars. Any infringement of the national speed limits will automatically result in £60 being debited from your nominated bank account.
A government hotline will be rolled out nationally encouraging environmentalists to spoach through their neighbours dustbins and grass up anyone who is not recycling their waste plastics, glass and metals. Bin-men will now be accompanied by a Environmental Sustainability Enforcement Officer who will hand out fixed penalty notices to householders who have not disposed of their recyclables appropriately.
December 31, 2006 at 3:22 PM
Anonymous
said...
Steven_l You missed out.... Due to their special needs , all adult babies can claim rocking horses , bonnets and over sized nappies as tax deductables. not only that but grants will be available to buy the above for any scotsman over the age of 50.
December 31, 2006 at 3:59 PM
Anonymous
said...
True true Steven L and happy new year to you . Difn`t you predict an Ashes win for England a while ago , yes , in fact i may find it to show how much we should value your soothesaying
Your licence may be revoked if your behaviour shows that you are no longer safe to stay in the community. This might be because you have been charged with an imprisonable offence, or behaved in a way similar to that which led to you committing the original offence.
julian: thank you for telling me something I already know and confirming it for the Muppet Show on this blog!
December 31, 2006 at 5:43 PM
Anonymous
said...
"This might be" its an open deal, if you are considered likely to offend and "you are no longer safe to stay in the community." Well, i am no Lawyer, jailhouse or otherwise, but the above suggests to me that any lifer out on license who is making others feel unsafe due to his/her behaviour could very well be recalled to prison. Harassment of a law abiding member of the public by an axe murderer out on license suggests that said axe murderer may not have dealt with his issues and is likely to be dangerous. if i were to find myself in that position I would be getting in touch with the police force who have responsibility for him. One of the troubles with psychopaths is that they do not consider the consequences of their actions, combine that with their sense of entitlement and delusions of grandeur and they tend to keep getting themselves into trouble.
peter hitchens: This might be because I am the recognised foremost authority on prison law in the country, and know what I am talking about whereas for yourself I am puzzled to discover what you are good at. I feel sorry that you are a psychopath, it cannot be pleasant for you. My probation officer, and the police, and the Prison service are all glad that I am a proven success. A no account like yourself has no say in the matter. It is sad that blogging gives you a sense of self importance. On the other hand, I made history and became famous for this. I am sorry that you feel so inadequate. Perhaps, you should be yourself instead of impersonating someone else?
December 31, 2006 at 6:28 PM
Anonymous
said...
Sorry for interrupting the dialogue, but JHL you are NOT famous. You ARE a psychopath; your deeply unpleasant personality has come out, and unfortunately I doubt this nastiness is restricted to blogs.
anonymous 7.37: What about the 72,200 for John Hirst prison law?
December 31, 2006 at 8:00 PM
Anonymous
said...
Anon 742
Hitchens may be a bore re Hirst. But what response is there to a posturing unrepentent murderer who bought his Z celebrity with the blood of his landlady. Why should this or any other blog allow itself to be infested by worthless scum. Read about Hirst and you may understand why some of us refuse to ack that he has any right to be anywhere other than under a rock. FFS this posturing fuckwit is glad of his dishing it out with an axe to a defenceless old woman.Its made him a 'man'. Someone of note. Think about it. If Guido tells me to FO thats his right.
December 31, 2006 at 8:04 PM
Anonymous
said...
I have seen the references. In particular the article from The Guardian. I repeat, you are NOT famous. Google has links for me, and I am far from famous, so that's nothing to go by. You are a worthless disgrace and you are despised.
December 31, 2006 at 8:09 PM
Anonymous
said...
only 98% more .. and you equal dog+shit.
December 31, 2006 at 8:14 PM
Anonymous
said...
John Hirst's response to Bronia Burton's request to bring in some coal:
.....but there's still 3,140,000 for dog+shit. That makes you just a tad less famous or should I say infamous. There is a subtle difference y'know.
December 31, 2006 at 8:25 PM
Anonymous
said...
Man of a decade
It does not fall to many leaders to revolutionise both the constitution and the culture of their country. After William the Conqueror and Oliver Cromwell comes Tony Blair. Like those other great leaders, he has distinguished himself by his contributions to military theory, extending Hitler’s vision of blitzkrieg to lightly armed and fast moving troops and finally to the point where men and vehicles have no armour at all. Yet every soldier is secure in the knowledge that behind him is a small army of civil servants ensuring that he does not waste any money on expensive bullets and such. Thus Tony is able to attack more and more enemies with fewer and fewer soldiers.
So clear has been his political vision that he has developed new ways of governing that have not been seen before. Previous leaders have given priority to ensuring that their nation is self sufficient in energy and food. Only Tony has seen that we can rely for energy on our staunch friends, the Arabs, and that kindly Mr Putin, so we do not have to think about controversial things such as nuclear power stations and can go on covering the countryside with windmills that only work 20% of the time, yet are such a wonderful and ever present monument to our new age of enlightenment. For food we can rely on an even wider circle of friends, such as our historic allies the good old French farmers.
He has eliminated much of the annoyance of parliamentary democracy by delegating the most important decisions to unelected European Commissioners and dealing with the rest from his famous sofa. The MPs are kept quiet with ever more generous payments from the public purse. By sheer hypnotic power, he has lulled the electorate into such a state of trance that it accepts, and regards as normal, levels of taxation that would have induced riots in times past.
He has swept aside the fuddy-duddy old culture, with its boring old writers, composers etc, and replaced it with the completely new celebrity culture that every one can join in. While all those windmills will be his lasting concrete monument (Look on my works, ye mighty, and despair!) his cultural monument will be the reality TV show.
He was ever the man of action. While others fretted about the West Lothian Question, he simply ignored it and drew up a new constitution that involved just one country of the four being denied its own parliament and being forced to subsidise the others, while they were given votes on its affairs. Only Tony realised that the English had become too effete to raise a protest. Likewise, while others wavered about the future of the House of Lords, at a stroke he eliminated the hereditary peers, and hence the main opposition to his glorious vision, replacing them with the right sort and simultaneously overcoming the funding problems of his party. Without the hereditaries’ pathetic concerns about the rights of individuals, he was able to implement vital policies such as the smoking ban and the forthcoming bans on salt consumption and fat people in public places.
Of course, his great political war cry was “Education, education, education” and this is where he has wrought the greatest changes. He has, for example, managed to close down most university departments of Physics, which were always nests of opposition to Good Green Science, while achieving world domination in Media Studies. In schools he has pressed on with the everybody passes principle, so that no one knows who is academically able, which is as it should be. At the same time he has achieved a rebalance of the sexes by feminising the education system. The alienation of many boys and the creation of gangs of feral youths is a small price to pay for the advance of women.
His greatest achievement, however, is to oblige the Conservative Party to abandon every principle it ever stood for and put up a pale imitation of himself as an alternative. That is true greatness!
26/12/06
http://www.numberwatch.co.uk/2006%20December.htm
December 31, 2006 at 8:31 PM
Anonymous
said...
I hope Guido will take some action over the constant nuisance. It is entirely clear who is to blame and it is not those who are understandably affronted by JHL. I wish to return to wit and politics .
If nothing is done then there are other blogs.
December 31, 2006 at 8:35 PM
Anonymous
said...
Bhownagree,
ref apricotangent@8.31: I thought you said your big brother had "gone away". Why is he back in the "community"? Do you have his lithium?
December 31, 2006 at 8:40 PM
Anonymous
said...
Anon. 8:40
"Bhownagree" was a hoax, but "Bhownaggree" will come back some day, mark my words.
December 31, 2006 at 8:59 PM
Anonymous
said...
For fuck's sake Guido sort the comments out!
December 31, 2006 at 9:53 PM
Anonymous
said...
Ralph said... "Anon. 8:40:"Bhownagree" was a hoax, but "Bhownaggree" will come back some day, mark my words."
You've got it the wrong way round.
December 31, 2006 at 10:20 PM
Anonymous
said...
Jailhousetosser, axe murderer of old ladies, a pathetic twat who apparently thinks he's famous, is on here calling other people "trolls".
Maybe he got an irony bypass thrown in for free with the ethical one.
December 31, 2006 at 10:38 PM
Anonymous
said...
Happy new year : Its just your jive talkin Youre telling me lies, yeah Jive talkin You wear a disguise Jive talkin So misunderstood, yeah Jive talkin You really no good
Oh, my child Youll never know Just what you mean to me Oh, my child You got so much Youre gonna take away my energy
With all your jive talkin Youre telling me lies, yeah Good lovin Still gets in my eyes Nobody believes what you say Its just your jive talkin That gets in the way
Oh my love Youre so good Treating me so cruel There you go With your fancy lies Leavin me lookin Like a dumbstruck fool With all your
Jive talkin Youre telling me lies, yeah Jive talkin You wear a disguise Jive talkin So misunderstood, yeah Jive talkin You just aint no good
Love talkin Is all very fine, yeah Jive talkin Just isnt a crime And if theres somebody Youll love till you die Then all that jive talkin Just gets in your eye
Jive talkin Youre telling me lies,yeah Good lovin Still gets in my eyes Nobody believes what you say Its just your jive talkin That gets in the way
Love talkin Is all very fine, yeah Jive talkin, just isnt a crime And if theres somebody Youll love till you die Then all that jive talkin Just gets in your eye
Hitchens is a first-rate chap. No bore is he. Indeed, Hitch is well-regarded throughout the blogosphere for his rhetorical skill and trenchant insight. except for Dave Cameron where Hitch is just plain wrong. Frankly, PHITCHophobes are scum in extremis. And a happy new year to one and all...
December 31, 2006 at 11:50 PM
Anonymous
said...
Hijacked by the mentally ill.
This Blog is so over.
RIP
January 1, 2007 at 12:41 AM
Anonymous
said...
au contraire It's Stayin' Alive
January 1, 2007 at 12:50 AM
Anonymous
said...
tb bg < dog+shit
Just dropped by, can't stop, byeeeeeEEEEEEEEEE!
January 1, 2007 at 1:44 AM
Anonymous
said...
cause were living in a world of fools Breaking us down When they all should let us be We belong to you and me
January 1, 2007 at 2:28 AM
Anonymous
said...
Poor Tony: When you lose control and you got no soul Its tragedy
Just as a sideline to current irrelevance may I wish you all a Happy 2007 and may we all live in interesting times this year, as I am sure Mr Blair will and Mr Hussein just failed to ...
January 1, 2007 at 3:00 AM
Anonymous
said...
Im a tad rat-arsed yes, but one fact about the coming political year is indeed carved in stone. The rag bag dole scroungers, the disability army, & feckless filth will continue to support Neo Labour, despite the numbers of poor people slaughtered in the sovereign nation once known as EYERACK. No matter how low this wretched shower stoop, they can always rely on weighing votes in the Northern Metropolis shyteholes, and similar blasted wasteland estates of North & East London and also Essex. Hopefully at least significant numbers of Labour Drones who have seats in semi rural constituencies will be facing political oblivion.
If the tories don't start polling really strongly in the Kent constituencies held in Labour's grip, Cameroon will come under real pressure. If the working class people of the Thanets etc don't begin buying into DC, the right wing knives will be glinting. How many MP's use class A drugs? Quite a number.
January 1, 2007 at 5:53 AM
Anonymous
said...
How many MPs use class A drugs? I'm sure it is quite a number. I am equally sure that quite a lot of blog commenters do as well.
January 1, 2007 at 6:08 AM
Anonymous
said...
Girlyboy, I was on classA AND catA before you were born.
Far be it from me to try and tell you how to run your blog, but if I may, a small request for the New Year:
Please bang some of the children's heads together. Their bickering is starting to make reading the comments tiresome.
Other than that, please carry on the good work and may the New Year bring you yet more (in)famy.
January 1, 2007 at 9:32 AM
Anonymous
said...
Its no good there is no point in this place any more.
Goodbye Guido
January 1, 2007 at 9:35 AM
Anonymous
said...
Having just read through the above comments I must say they were rather amusing. A bit like politicalbetting.com without the mutual masturbation. Keep up the good work, you guys, and let Guido have a well-earned break. No doubt normal service will be resumed as soon as the political pond-life floats back up to the surface.
January 1, 2007 at 11:23 AM
Anonymous
said...
Anonymous said... 7:42 PM
"I just hope peter hitchens and jailhouselawyer ... Either that or both die."
Please god, yes.
January 1, 2007 at 11:46 AM
Anonymous
said...
Four predictions:
1. A lot of people on the "Arab Street" will tell us that Saddam was never executed, it was all faked by the Americans, an actor was used, the real Saddam is living in Brazil, etc. etc.
2. The Government, under the guise of cost control, will emasculate the Freedom of Information Act.
3. Voices on the left will urge the government to "regulate" internet blogs.
4. Sadly, Guido, your blog will attract ever fewer postings, as it is increasingly taken over by the tinfoil hat brigade.
January 1, 2007 at 11:52 AM
Anonymous
said...
I thought everyone was going to ignore JHL. Perhaps he will then get bored and go away.
January 1, 2007 at 12:10 PM
Anonymous
said...
Perhaps he will then get bored and go away.
I think you speak for many.He spreads misery wherever he goes. What a pointless life
January 1, 2007 at 12:21 PM
Anonymous
said...
I wish Guido would just ban JHL. He's abhorrent.
January 1, 2007 at 12:36 PM
Anonymous
said...
Ignore the trolls JHL. I can tell that you are a caring, sensitive chap, and would like to take this opportunity to wish you a Happy New Year.
January 1, 2007 at 1:01 PM
Anonymous
said...
...I `m gonna sit right down and write myself a letter. Sums it up. Lets all try to pretend he does not exist. If not ...go elsewhere
January 1, 2007 at 1:07 PM
Anonymous
said...
Lay off poor Lembit. After being the only Lib Dem MP stupid enough to back Mark Oaten for Leader (even before the brown stuff hit the fan!) he is now just drifting into a mid-life crisis before he is fired towards alpha centuri in a search for intelligent life.
Goege Osbourne feel my bum!
January 1, 2007 at 1:13 PM
Anonymous
said...
"My probation officer, and the police, and the Prison service are all glad"
margorie, JHL is just a narcissist - like Blair, Cameron and Kennedy only a bit worse. let's just be glad that the three of them don't come on here polluting with their self-aggrandising drivel.
January 1, 2007 at 1:18 PM
Anonymous
said...
Did Guido predict the happenstances of the last year? I cannot locate the post for 01/01/06. Did it see the light of day? Was it deleted to avoid tarnishing the good Guy's political mystique?
Guido groupies need to know.
January 1, 2007 at 1:28 PM
Anonymous
said...
re 4. Sadly, Guido, your blog will attract ever fewer postings, as it is increasingly taken over by the tinfoil hat brigade.
A conclusion is the point at which you stop thinking
January 1, 2007 at 2:16 PM
Anonymous
said...
quotes of the year?
"I could murder a pie" Cherie Blair's verdict on Gordon's conference sppech.
January 1, 2007 at 2:36 PM
Anonymous
said...
“I have never known how mendacious [Brown] was, how full of mendacity.” Tony Blair
January 1, 2007 at 2:39 PM
Anonymous
said...
Tony Falsetto (contd)
How deep is your love... for your self...for yourself..
Nobody gives a monkeys...
'Cos you're living in a world of dreams
And you ought to let it be
Self-destruct along with Cherie....
January 1, 2007 at 2:48 PM
Anonymous
said...
I'd welcome JHL's absence because he provokes loud-mouthed, self-righteous arseholes like Hitchens. Otherwise what JHL has done is irrelevant to this blog and can v. easily be discussed elsewhere by those excited and interested by it.
January 1, 2007 at 2:50 PM
Anonymous
said...
Mottles 2.39 “I have never known how mendacious [Brown] was, how full of mendacity.” Tony Blair
They say it takes one to know one.
January 1, 2007 at 2:51 PM
Anonymous
said...
Please go away JHL you are sucking the life from this blog .Please please go away .
January 1, 2007 at 2:53 PM
Anonymous
said...
"massofchewsetsssssss..."
January 1, 2007 at 3:14 PM
Anonymous
said...
Quote of the year: "Twice a year Gordon Brown fills his party's sails with pride. His tornado of facts and figures magics up images of untold national wealth and success. Standing at the dispatch box, the towering superiority of his brain makes intellectual pygmies of his opponents" Polly Toynbee ONB Private Eye
January 1, 2007 at 3:17 PM
Anonymous
said...
GEEKY AND HIS CHEEKY "according to Cheeky Mum Margit, it's lurve. Speaking exclusively to us of her 24-year-old's romance, Margit laughed: "She is so happy. All the Romanians back home think it's wonderful and say Father Christmas has bought Gabriela an MP." http://www.mirror.co.uk/3am/tm_headline=geeky-and-his-cheeky%26method=full%26objectid=18360672%26siteid=94762-name_page.html
January 1, 2007 at 3:33 PM
Anonymous
said...
'Migrationwatch' are predicting that any significant reduction in their previously predicted flood of immifrants to the UK from Romania will be entirely due to the wide-promulgation of rumours in Bucharest that being placed legs -a-kimbo at the mercy of the MP for Montgomery is part of the official immigration procedures. For females, that is - the males are placed at the mercy of Mark Oaten
January 1, 2007 at 4:05 PM
Anonymous
said...
javelin said... I would like to make my top 5 predictions.
1) That they will find the number of foreign born prisoners has tripled under New Labour (according to my cousin who runs a well known prisoner charity), and that Gordon Brown has not funded new prisons or probation services and he has allowed dangerous criminals on the street because the waves of new prisoners have pushed them out. Gordon is trying to privatise the probation service to escape blame for not protecting the public.
2) That Gordon Brown has issued over 820,000 National Insurance Cards (that give free access to schooling and health care) without any checks being made. According to my Uncle who runs a branch of the Treasury.
3) That Gordon Brown has given many, mny billions to large accounting, software, legal, weapon consultancies who has allowed a systemic oligopoly at the heart of most Government departments - whereby consultants (salesmen) work permanently "helping" the ministers to allocate contracts to which Gordon pays without question - according to a friend who works for Microsoft in such a job.
4) That figure will emerge showing that Gordon Brown has allocated more money to New Labour heartlands than has previously been admitted. This will lead to a rise in the number of people calling for an English Parliament - and that politicians will ignore it.
5) That Gordon Brown's inflation figures will come under increasing scrutiny as being an irrelevant measure of inflation. As the world economy continues to grow - and be held back by limited resources, with consequential increases in inflation and interest rates his boasts that he decided to form the BofE committee will become sullied as both they and Gordon argue about who is responsible for defining what inflation is. Rates will be at least 1% higher at the end of the year, with the first .25% rise coming in February. Gordon will blame everybody but himself for the rise in inflation.
and....
6)the UK house price bubble finally bursts ending the debt-fuelled spending boom that has kept Brown's enron economy afloat.
7) We get to see the infamous Brown on the rocking horse photos
January 1, 2007 at 4:27 PM
Anonymous
said...
Anonymous said... .... the males are placed at the mercy of Mark Oaten
You mean they're forced to shit in his gob?
January 1, 2007 at 4:29 PM
Anonymous
said...
Bloody hell, anonymous 4.27! It seems like HM government is part of your private family firm. When did your lot first give Blair holiday hospitality?
January 1, 2007 at 4:42 PM
Anonymous
said...
"this age of Blair was, for many, also an age of plenty. For the working, home-owning majority, the past decade has been a time of ever greater self-enrichment. On the back of rocketing property prices, low inflation and easy credit, the British have travelled the world and filled their homes with gizmos that would have made Nero or Louis XIV goggle with envy."
Jackie Ashley 'GET READY FOR A GUST OF OPTIMISM ON ALL FRONTS'
" It is going to be good not because Gordon Brown will alight from his chariot and save the Labour party - though I hope he does "
January 1, 2007 at 4:50 PM
Anonymous
said...
If anyone wants to know what a whoopee cushion which bursts at both ends is like, you only have to send out for Ashley-Marr!
Both so far up the Noolabor passage that they remind one of Mark oaten on a bad hair day.
January 1, 2007 at 5:18 PM
Anonymous
said...
In the rush of politicians to re-brand themselves as 'going back to our roots', John Prescot and Mark Oaten will, upon cessation of membership of the lower house, collaborate in a production of "Boys from the Brown Stuff", a hair-raising adventure of life on the political right of David Cameron. Predictions that Prescot will have dyed on his first night are pouring in.
Incidentally, who IS ruining/running this country while Blair is off playing swampie?
January 1, 2007 at 5:46 PM
Anonymous
said...
I wish I could be involved in a front page scandal preferably with one or both of the cheeky girls or a weather lady with good teeth...
January 1, 2007 at 5:48 PM
Anonymous
said...
What's in store for 2007?
The BNP to treble their councillors in the May local elections mainly due to mass defections of angry and disaffected white working-class former Labour voters.
Tories to go over 10 points into the lead over Labour in the polls.
Brown's ponzi scheme aka the UK economy, comes off the rails leading to recession, mass unemployment, house price crash, bankruptcies, repos, etc.
Taxes up to pay for increased public spending and public sector wage rises after Unison militancy.
Growing backlash against immigration, crime, corruption and other consequences of Labour's ten years in power.
More cracks appear in the "multi-cultural" experiment as Britain becomes increasingly Balkanised.
The pound collapses on the foreign exchanges against the euro, the yen and the renminbi. Calls increase to ditch sterling and join the safe haven of the euro.
Social unrest, crime, drug/alcohol abuse, increases.
January 1, 2007 at 6:13 PM
Anonymous
said...
Did anyone see Champagne Charlie Kennedy on "Celeb Who's a Wannabe Millionaire"?
Paired up with a bit of well-wearing Murdoch tottie - each equally as dim as the other. Packed in after all his lifelines had gone and still couldn't define 'Psyche'. I always thought a Lib Dem leader might have a wide grasp of the terminology for describing our souls!!!.
Beware the Ides of Ming!
January 1, 2007 at 6:23 PM
Anonymous
said...
Did anyone see Champagne Charlie Kennedy on "Celeb Who's a Wannabe Millionaire"?
For about two minutes. God, weren't they boring?
January 1, 2007 at 6:33 PM
Anonymous
said...
Limpdick O'Prik's increasingly erratic and arrogant behaviour followed by further revelations about his private life leads to his deselection.
Good feckin riddance.
January 1, 2007 at 6:48 PM
Anonymous
said...
bleugh: JAckie Ashley: "Gordon Brown will alight from his chariot and save the Labour party"
What are they on at the Gordian these days?
January 1, 2007 at 6:53 PM
Anonymous
said...
The Gordian
Maybe they're i-pods are stuck on repeat:
" Things can only get better..."
January 1, 2007 at 6:58 PM
Anonymous
said...
Or, as they sing in the Lib Dems:
"Thongs can only get buttered"
January 1, 2007 at 7:02 PM
Anonymous
said...
Anon 6.48 are you 'the only fascist in the village'?
January 1, 2007 at 7:04 PM
Anonymous
said...
Saddam: The First Makings of a Conspiracy Theory
Trumpeter is right about one thing: there will be conspiracy theories about Saddam's execution. Moreover the "full" video does nothing to disprove any such theory.
1. Whether the government paid a professional (The Guardian) or both videos are amateur (the short video is from a different angle) the quality of the long video can only be the result of ineptitude or careful planning. 2. The long videoer frequently loses focus on the subject and points his camera at the floor or the stairs. 3. However, for key moments (from a conspiracy theorist's point of view) his hands suddenly become remarkably steady e.g. just before the drop. 4. For other key moments he goes back to filming metal plate e.g. just after the drop and before Saddam has fallen far enough for you to see how far he actually drops. 5. He then stays out of focus long enough for the scene on the floor to have been arranged after Saddam's fall was broken in some manner (a platform? a safe pair of arms?). 6. The insults and the rebuke of one of the insulters can be explained as simple theatrics designed to make it appear convincing. 7. If the video was government sponsored that simply adds to the mystery: why choose an inept cameraman and film with such bad lighting? Answer: because they would have needed a top flight big stunt magician to have carried it off in daylight or in a well lit room. 8. Contrary to some reports Saddam looks perfectly calm, just as if he knows it's all playacting and he is not really going to die!
When the real conspiracy theorists get to work 2007 will see many more elaborate versions of the above posted on the net. If there is a prize for the most accurate prediction I think I'm on a winner here.
January 1, 2007 at 7:25 PM
Anonymous
said...
She said: "There was such a build-up of desire and a huge explosion between us. Lembit was very gentle and passionate, his hands all over my body.
"And the more we make love, the better it gets.
January 1, 2007 at 7:29 PM
Anonymous
said...
Big chin. . . biig hands. . . biiig. . .
(well we knew that anyway, he supported Oaten for leader!)
January 1, 2007 at 7:38 PM
Anonymous
said...
You are right mgic Steven. Saddam and princess Di are actually shacked up at Conrad Black's place in Canada, together with Dodi's love-child who Saddam has adopted.
January 1, 2007 at 7:40 PM
Anonymous
said...
What I would really love to see is a photograph of lembits face taken from "underneath" as in from the point of view of the cheeky girl he services. Try it yourselves, put a mirror on a flat surface lean over it and see what you look like to the lady you are fucking. If you are over the age of 30 I guarantee that you will never again look her in the face whilst on the job without thinking "I know what Im getting out of this, but what's in it for you?" Maybe that explains why so many LibDems go in for backdoor action.
January 1, 2007 at 7:51 PM
Anonymous
said...
Peter H, I take your point (or rather, I don't!) but surely in Lembit's case that chin obscures all?
January 1, 2007 at 8:07 PM
Anonymous
said...
OBN said... bleugh: JAckie Ashley: "Gordon Brown will alight from his chariot and save the Labour party"
shouldn't that read "alight from his rocking-horse"?
January 1, 2007 at 8:29 PM
Anonymous
said...
Anonymous said... Anon 6.48 are you 'the only fascist in the village'?
Is that you Limpdick?
January 1, 2007 at 8:30 PM
Anonymous
said...
I fear not sire, and would suggest that your choice of moniker belies the only aspect of the meteor-watching Ulsterman which might appeal to the tight-arsed ones from Carpathia. Indeed he's probably somewhere 'exercising' the appendage right now. After all, it's not likely to be for too long!
January 1, 2007 at 8:35 PM
Anonymous
said...
To clarify, anonymous (7:40 pm), I did not say I thought Saddam was not killed. I simply said that the film did not prove that he was. I went on to say that conspiracy theorists would make hay while the sun shines. A public execution would have solved the problem. Now the Iraq government faces decades of speculation and enquiry on a par with JFK and the grassy knoll and, indeed, as you rightly mention, Princess Dianna and the car crash. Conrad Black, who you also mention, is in an entirely different category:
1. He is undoubtedly alive; 2. He is the subject of both criminal and civil proceedings; and 3. He will have the right to and will defend himself with the best lawyers money can buy.
Why would you mention Conrad Black in the same context as the others? Are you a fan and believe he is being persecuted rather prosecuted under due process?
January 1, 2007 at 8:48 PM
Anonymous
said...
The Final Steps to abolish the UK start in March 07
http://eutruth.org.uk
January 1, 2007 at 10:36 PM
Anonymous
said...
Well, Canada's anti-capital punishment, but we might make an exception for Conrad. Mostly, though, we're with Rick Mercer, who says we should allow him to regain his citizenship, and then we should never, ever, for even a moment, allow him to forget it.
January 1, 2007 at 10:39 PM
Anonymous
said...
Well, raincoaster, I am wholly opposed to capital punishment. This includes Conrad Black. That inclusion just shows how serious I am about not killing people even if they are transparently innoccent, like, you know, Mr Black. Gosh, his lawyers are low sleepers and fast workers. CONRAD BLACK IS INNOCENT. I absolutely deny the truth of anything I said before this sentence.
January 2, 2007 at 12:45 AM
Anonymous
said...
"You are right mgic Steven. Saddam and princess Di are actually shacked up at Conrad Black's place in Canada, together with Dodi's love-child who Saddam has adopted."
In every film made where there has been a hanging scene (eg Polanski's Macbeth) the actor always, died.
I think it's time you started charging Guido - you really need to ration access to weed out the undesirables. Let the plebs have access to older posts whilst serious commentators prepared to pay good money have access to a more elevated discussion on the breaking news.
January 2, 2007 at 11:08 AM
Anonymous
said...
Labour will be lucky to come third in the next election, maybe not for the reasons we all want but it will happen anyway.Tax, immigrants and the war have made Labour an embarrassment to the politically disinterested majority. The millions of people who frankly couldnt give a F**k about politics have already decided that they will not vote Labour. This vast group of voters do not care what Brown says or does. This group of voters (not the middle class, middle ground, concerned, eco-baffled tools Cameron is hiding behind)cannot be hoodwinked because they simply dont read the politics pages, they dont care who is actually in government because they know they are all the same, they simply act as the brake when the politicians completely lose touch with reality and start believing their own farcical propaganda. It took them years to realise Maggie had left then they allowed NuLabour in because they seemed fairly tame and the Tories had wasted years after the economic reforms had been implemented.Nobody voted NuLabour into power because there was nothing to vote for, no radical agenda, no vision, no goals, no moronic left wing policies, just another ambitious posh tool who wasnt a Tory.
These people do not vote tactically or give a toss that their local MP is an utter disgrace, who votes against the view of his constituents or even know their name;they simply curb the excesses by either abstaining (preferred option) or begrudgingly dragging themselves down the local school hall, missing either Corrie, Eastenders,Cash in the Attic, or that thing on BBC2 that looked quite good) once every 5 years if something has annoyed them particularly strongly(TAX,TAX,TAX bloody asylum seekers,one of the government didnt cry at Dianas funeral etc).
This may all seem rather negative but its not, it presents the greatest opportunity for the Conservative Party; if you know you are going to win anyway why not get a proper mandate? Yes David, all the things we know you really believe in, know need to be done but have been too afraid to mention in case it means we lose the Chipping Gorton North key marginal (with unpopular A list PC, townie) as a consequence of having offended some influential local do gooder?
Whilst clearly it is the greatest issue of our time (which is lucky given everyone is trying to hide behind it)but the effing climate will still be there in 2 years time, but meanwhile 3000 PEOPLE, not lesser-spotted warblers,are being KILLED each month in a stupid, illegal,war that we have already lost is going on with your support. Take a step back and work out which one will get apathetic voters off their arses and out to actually vote FOR you instead of AGAINST the doomed losers currently in power.
Ihave ben shocked at the number of Tory (and clueless early Bliar fans) who now openly support the BNP,UKIP,etc. These group offer NO threat to the Tory party fortunes at the next election, they might cost you a few a seats here and there, but in the scheme of things they ARE irrelevent. For the very simple reaon that if you cannot beat these utterly discredited muppets by a landslide and are worried about a few seats in order to head a Tory government then you will have lost anyway. The opportunity is there to end the phoney war on policies; tell the people the serious and major elements of your policies if elected. The issues that are utmost in voters minds are;
Europe - It is UNPOPULAR on a scale only politicians seem unable to see,fundementally flawed in design, illegal in operation and wholly undemocratic.If you could only see yourselves preaching about political engagement and spreading of democratic values when you support this disgrace.
Iraq - If you really want to support the troops get Blair into parliament to explain his strategy for our troops and their well being, when he fails to turn up/tell the truth/asks the Caravaning Ken Dodd lool-a-like to stand in for him you have the excuse you need to with draw your support.Lib DEms 22% and rising anti-war - Blair international criminal and Labour down the tubes. You work it out, oh and by the way - everyone knows its Blairs war and its pointless, we all support the troops and would have them home tomorrowWE HAVE ALREADY LOST.Why supports it? what possible benefit is to be had from supporting this??? Seeing our troops die for no reason never won a vote in the UK.
How controversial are these issues really? they have the added benefit of being POPULAR amongst the VOTERS. Clearly that is a concept politicians struggle with,even if the public ae wrong and pulling out turns out to be the wrong thing to do and BUsh was right all along. Our wrst case outcome is we save our troops from death and injury.
F**k me even Ming Campbell got this one right!
January 2, 2007 at 11:28 AM
Anonymous
said...
Myrddin Wen said..."The Final Steps to abolish the UK start in March 07 ... http://eutruth.org.uk "
My God! You actually believe this crap!!!!!
January 2, 2007 at 2:27 PM
Anonymous
said...
quotes of the year:
"Disgraced Lib-Dem MP Mark Oaten owns a springer spaniel called Coco." (Cut to photo of Oaten walking Coco) "There he is, the frisky little bottom sniffer... with Coco." - Trevor McDoughnut (Have I Got News For You)"
179 comments:
Blair gets a new job with the EU as head of the Standard and Ethics Board.
If 4 is correct expect a very,very,lively year!!!!!
Well you are 2 days ahead of us so you have rather an advantage!
I predict the Tyburn Jig for Bliar.
http://tyburnjig.blogspot.com/
1. Lembit Opik will be involved in a front-page scandal.
Since he's already predicted something similar himself, this isn't much of a surprise. Nevertheless, Guido is 1-0 ahead.
2. Following a surge to the SNP in local elections the Conservatives will finally move away from Unionism and towards spinning off Scottish and Welsh sister parties as part of their localism agenda.
Scottish local elections held under PR for the first time, meaning everyone (including Tories) wins seats in areas that used to be barren for them and proclaims a surge. However, Cameron makes announcement anyway, because it will wind up the old guard and make him look fresh. Guido is 2-0 and crowing.
3. Multiple charges will be brought against Downing Street characters in the Loans for Lordships scandal. Evidence of profiteering by Labour donors with government contracts awarded in dubious circumstances will surface. The fall-out will be politically devastating for Labour.
Multiple charges are brought against minor characters who no-one has heard of. Devastation occurs among political classes, but the general public fails to be impressed as they already believed all politicians are crooks anyway and it can't be that bad because Blair wasn't charged. Guido claims to be at 3-0, but not everyone is convinced.
4. Informal Tory approaches will be made to leading LibDem figures as to discussions on the shape of the future governing coalition.
And leading Lib Dems, who all believe that Cameron will implode before the election and that Osborne isn't capable of adding up his own pocket money, let alone operate as Vince Cable's boss, tell the Tories to piss off. A week later Guido drops Delphic hints about the story, which the Times expands into a front page lead. Guido, at 4-0, announces plans for a range of Order Order action figures, body splash and tea towels.
5. New Media outlets will start to go mass market, disrupting the established politico-media nexus and terrifying old media owners.
Guido gets invited to more parties and award ceremonies, declines to take part in "I'm a Celebrity", declares a 5-0 clean sweep and global dominance, and is accepted as a fully paid-up, sold-out member of the established politico-media nexus. Iain Dale responds by competing in "Strictly Come Dancing", finishing third.
Don't know anything about 1 or 2, but I think you're correct on 3. Of course 4 will happen (probably already has happened). There will be no paper trail around it though. I think I know what you mean by 5, but you couldn't be a bit more specific about what you mean by "New Media outlets". Sorry about the serious tone of this comment - you started it.
ANDY a feather in your nose is all you need to fly that’s right Dumbo fly fly!!!
Lib Dems who all believe that Cameron will implode. Pah!!
They also believe you can be a tax cutting benefit increasing Libertarian law and order party. What’s more they blame the frequent embarrassment of their local parties adopting diametrically opposed views on a” Liberal " decentralised structure .
In other words this is not a party at all but a loose confederation of opportunists and show boaters. History shows the folly of getting into bed with them and I`m not talking about Straight Choice Hughes .Guido has been counting ,on his pudgy fingers , specifically the ICM poll showing a pact would be needed to form a government. Not after the boundary commission my politically myopic chum and also not after Browns move to the centre destroys Labour in the Celtic Fringe . What’s more not after the devastation of the Supply side wrecking and the chasm in Broons sums bubble malodorously to the surface .
I have a prediction
1 Broon : first 100 days . He will offer to scrap inheritance tax . Credit to Nick Drew on for the logic and maths in the George during intensive ”Putting the world to rights work”
2 Cameron will continue steady as she goes with no commitments to hard policy despite wails of schoolboy mass debaters ( Have this from a source who would know ).Tory plans are to stay vague a further 12 months .(Its working)
3 Blair will fuck off with a young tasty sauce pot . He doesn’t need her money any more or the “image”
4The growth of the new right will pile intelligently timed pressure on Cameron and the second the good ship Tory is safely docked in the harbour of state UP GOES THE JOLLY ROGER RUN RUN YOU LIBERAL SCUM BAGS RUN AS THE RAIN OF FIERY TAX CUTS POURS ONTO YOUR COSY MEDIA HOUSE OF STRAW!!!
BBC Dead !
Yummy and Marr on toast is still on the menu run like a rat though he may
Old Bore's Almanac:
Although Yates managed to nail some of the smaller fry, Teflon Tony get off yet again, although, like O.J. Simpson, everyone believes him to be guilty. After Blair resigns, Murdoch ofers him a lucrative deal to publish his autobiography entitled: "How I would have sold honours for cash if I had ben guilty of doing it."
After Ming experiences a number of "senior moments", he is ousted in a coup. This comes as a shock to Ming who didn't realise he was leader of the LibDems.
Guido fully expects to be right on the majority of his predicitions...
You didnt predict somebody nicking your bike in 2006 did you?
My one wish (as these are obviously wishes not predictions) is for the BBCs extortion funded model to go when analogue broadcasts are switched off, and the only TV broadcasts are digital, and thus subscription.
NewMania,
Something without mass cannot implode. It can however easily fade away.
I cough the job ,
I think the BBC offers great value for money , plenty of waste and many members of staff should be sent to a re-education camp , however, its great value for money.
They fucking sacked that cunt noel edmunds so they cant be all bad.
I think Ive discovered what Tony will be doing ...
Wing Commander BBC1
Sun 31 Dec, 12:15 am - 1:50 am 95mins
Blair, a fighter pilot, joins an interstellar war to fight the evil Kilrathi who are trying to destroy the universe. [Chris Roberts, 1999][S]
1. Jan 2007 - Pai Mei (=P Mandelson) teaches Dave the five point palm-exploding heart technique during The Tory leader's 3rd secret Brussels visit to the old matelot
2. Brown a shoo-in March 2007 after T Blair's ticker explodes following a short scuffle with Cameron doing a Heseltine with the mace
3. Late March - Snap election called by Gordo for June
4. June - Balls increases rectal probe voltage to 11 but it's all too late & Broon loses snap election, resigns and is snapped up by The Unity Bank
5. July - Dave stands on the portal to No 10 in a Groundhog Day moment from 1st May 1997
and...
6. September - Lady T reaches the top of the Dead Pool list and finally drops off her perch
I can add to prediction number 3. That large consultancies had "embedded" consultants (i.e. salesmen) inside most of the Government department who took turns allocating multi-million pound contracts.
Fuck all this - I'm gonna watch The Arse on Sky.
I would like to make my top 5 predictions.
1) That they will find the number of foreign born prisoners has tripled under New Labour (according to my cousin who runs a well known prisoner charity), and that Gordon Brown has not funded new prisons or probation services and he has allowed dangerous criminals on the street because the waves of new prisoners have pushed them out. Gordon is trying to privatise the probation service to escape blame for not protecting the public.
2) That Gordon Brown has issued over 820,000 National Insurance Cards (that give free access to schooling and health care) without any checks being made. According to my Uncle who runs a branch of the Treasury.
3) That Gordon Brown has given many, mny billions to large accounting, software, legal, weapon consultancies who has allowed a systemic oligopoly at the heart of most Government departments - whereby consultants (salesmen) work permanently "helping" the ministers to allocate contracts to which Gordon pays without question - according to a friend who works for Microsoft in such a job.
4) That figure will emerge showing that Gordon Brown has allocated more money to New Labour heartlands than has previously been admitted. This will lead to a rise in the number of people calling for an English Parliament - and that politicians will ignore it.
5) That Gordon Brown's inflation figures will come under increasing scrutiny as being an irrelevant measure of inflation. As the world economy continues to grow - and be held back by limited resources, with consequential increases in inflation and interest rates his boasts that he decided to form the BofE committee will become sullied as both they and Gordon argue about who is responsible for defining what inflation is. Rates will be at least 1% higher at the end of the year, with the first .25% rise coming in February. Gordon will blame everybody but himself for the rise in inflation.
1. Broon goes for a snap election in 2007 to wrong-foot Cameron
2. Levy is fingered, but splits on Blair (nasty)
3. Slotgob ditches Tone a la Jowells to cling to her grubby HR trade.
4. UKIP gain first seat in HoC
"Gordon will blame everybody but himself."
Preposterous. The man is a saint; our saviour; our shining beacon in our hour of need. What's more, HE IS ALWAYS RIGHT.
My money is on Brown shaking up how the Government governs.
Whole Departments to be side-lined while his *mates* take executive charge (and fat pay cheques)
He is determined to embed his ideology and he knows he has little time before he is booted out.
One final prediction British Airways will mirror New Labour - their share price will be heading south for a long time to come.
I just got off the plane from Oslo with the family - "Fast Bagdrop" was taking 20 minutes per-person. The check in attendant was rude. The food on the plane was stale. The wine was vinegar. It took an hour and a quarter to get our bags at Heathrow because BA hadn't bought enough tractors - so they left the bags in the rain. Bloody Awful. That was club class! The board deserves the same fate as Blair and Brown et.al.
'spinning off Scottish and Welsh sister parties as part of their localism agenda.'
didn't realise there was anything left to spin off. but good luck to the .... anyway
How did you know me game plans for those corrupt coonts guido?
If the tories have any sense they will steer well clear of approaching those dishonest shytes
at rent boy, homo HQ.
Next year I will be mainly vestigating the Lib Dems, a few stories bubbling away about senior figures.
1. Stagflation in US.
2. Global slowdown, borrowing and taxes up in UK.
3. Brown unable to call early election because NuLab bankrupt. Soldiers on widely rumbled as Tax and Waste Chancellor.
4. Bhownagree tops himself.
5. George Galloway calls for National Day of Rememberance for his late friend Mr S Hussain.
I predict that if Blair or his cronies get any of their collars felt, the look of panic and terror on Blair,s face will be worth waiting to see. I don,t think, he could muster the same sense of control that Saddam showed, even at his own hanging. Saddam might have been an evil bastard and certainly deserved to hang but at least he wasn,t a shallow bastard, unlike our own glorious leader.
Surely one of the most corrosive effects of this wreched mendacious Government has been the fact people seem to allow more or less any behaviour having given up on politicians.
If so many voted for these filth despite the lies surrounding the case for war & the treatment of Dr Kelly, they wont really give two hoots about Government contracts for cash.
General election - May 2007.
Brown pours money into NHS and states what a hero he is.
The price of Bricks & Mortar crash by 40% creating economic mayhem, followed by the Stock Market.
Terrorism escalates to unparalleld levels in the aftermath of Saddam.The World becomes increasingly a no go area.
The General Election produces a hung Parliament following a low turnout after the Electorate shows its contempt for Polititians.
Its Goodbye to Gay Boy Dave Cameron,as he resigns after a major slice of traditional Tories and the Right wing fail to offer that margin of support
for that winning streak.
The Tories commence another spring clean of the Party and a bloodletting as to what went wrong.
UKIP and the BNP along with the GREEN PARTY celebrate a handful of MPs.
A Balance of Payments crisis is recognised as serious, as Tesco/Wal Mart etc are vilified for bringing tens of thousands of containers of crap and tat into the country from China and the Far East,which is tantamount to selling the UK Family silver.
Immigration rises to unprecedented levels.
The Euro shows signs of breaking as the Germans indicate a return to the Mark.
The US influence in the world falls as the crisis in the Middle East takes a turn for the worse and N Korea and Iran
poke fun at the weakend and enfeebled US.
The Temperature averages around the World rise rapidly as global warming increases with the growth in the eastern world economies.
"Dr" Crackers (failed) said ... 4. Bhownagree tops himself.
Not before I've milked my public sector pension dry (indexed-linked, don't you know?)
Tory Commentator: Quite the little ray of sunshine, aren't we?
Gamma ray, more like.
Brown's first major announcement will be the removal of the NHS from central Government control.
A fairly ruthless and utterly shameless attempt to break the connect people have of him being at the forefornt of shaping the state it's in today.
That will buy him the two years he needs.
2007 may well see real disaffection surfacing with Dave from the right wing of the party, & why not.
How did we end up with a Blair clone when the era of believing in nothing but the value of presentation, is shamefully closing.
Brown will ruthlessly expose Dave's lack of gravitas, or force him to state his positions.
When people know what you stand for they find it much easier to write you off, ask Ming the Mong.
Kennedy's coming back to be all things to all bummers, i mean people. People like to vote for you when they've no flippin' idea what you stand for.
No danger of the Blessed Margaret snuffing it in 2007. She is quite frankly indestructible.
Guido, once the Lib Demmers raise the question of Proportional Representation, what does the Tory side do? Quietly acquiesce to the possibility of a permanent Lib-Lab governing coalition at Westminster. 'don't think so....
Bhownagree
Have you deliberately fucked up a "Brownagree" moniker for some (to you) "humorous" reason know only to yourself, or are you just as fucking stupid as the queen of Kirkaldy?
Thank goodness you're back - I was beginning to fear a future entirely defined by Hitchen's shitting girlfriends and middle east obsessed political fantasists.
De predictions from de suburbs man is better dan yours:
Arsenal win de champions league at a canter;
TB is indicted once 'e leaves office;
Dave de hoodie shows 'is intelligence an resists revealin de election winnin policies too early;
GB reveals dat ten years as chancellor 'as exhausted im an can't think wot to do (especially cos de Tories is playin der cards close to der bras);
De Lib Dems slump in de polls;
De stock market 'as one good month, de January, an den..............!
All I'd want to see is that smug, self-serving wanker Drayson investigated over Powderject, his £50,000 investment in Labour which yielded him a £32m government contract and his subsequent £500,000 donation from that to Labour which earned him a peerage. Surely, SURELY that is worth some close scrutiny by Yates and his fellow inquisitors?
Go on Yates, just a few questions on Drayson to Ruth Turner and to Levy while you've got them both in custody ...
Mr Hitchens
What a tiresome oaf you are, to be sure. I am here to set the record straight concerning the Right Honourable Gordon Brown, our future PM and a man of vision and integrity. Come the hour ...
You, on the other, do not even qualify as pond-life. Am I wrong in thinking that you used to post here as PhoneCamFoolery, or was he just another racist bigot with Tourette's Syndrome?
You, on the other, do not even qualify as pond-life. Am I wrong in thinking that you used to post here as PhoneCamFoolery, or was he just another racist bigot with Tourette's Syndrome?
Fuck off you fat deluded queer
Is Yates investigating just cash/loans for honours or is he looking into all iffy payments? The late 19th century provided some really catch-all legislation in the younger and wilder days of capitalism. Public Bodies and Corrupt Practices Act is a good one, still on the books.
Gordon might not like that one at all.
Because neither Brown nor Blair nor any other NuLab fuckwit minister can run a corner shop, they have had to employ KPMG to tell them the time of day and have had to appoint serial shysters like Robinson Drayson and Evans to posts/quangos. BrownBlair and co have no discernment in the business world hence they are being shafted(and by definition us as well) by Drayson and others. This incompetence is the real tragedy of being governed by corrupt fuckwits.
Enjoying the ads for off-shore trusts. Was it a barter arrangement, Guido? As for Bhownagree is he really one of us or does he enjoy flak?
It is with regret that I announce the death of Mr P. Hitchens, at 8.27 this evening. Further details here. No flowers, please, cash donations only to his widow.
The post attributed to him at 8.35 is obviously a malicious forgery.
[Bhownagree: Yes, piss off!]
Bhown agree I have been accustomed to imagining you as a refugee from a bygone world of entertainment , a retired chorus boy perhaps .Most entertaining if you enjoy a dollop of pathos in your sweet cordial. I `m afraid the T has floated from your Widow Twanky routine this eve though.
Shame.
Pond Life ..tut tut how very very very coarse
I find it very unlikely that Hitchens has/ had a wife. Surely not even a incontinent bit of filth would marry him?
Prediction:
If someone does go down for the "loans for honours" business (ie if Goldsmith cannot be persuaded to order the case dropped) then they will be charged with offences which do not directly implicate Bliar.
Saddam was tried and hung for ordering the deaths of 148 Shia Iraqis and not for his use of chemical weapons and other crimes which may have caused embarrassment to a certain D Rumsfeld, presidential envoy to Iraq during the early 1980s.
Conservatives make more gains in local elections.
Brown to become most unpopular new PM in history.
Cameron's sceptics to finally realise they are on a winner.
Thank you, thank you, PH, for giving me the chance to point out that there's a "c" in 'Kirkaldy'.
Surely not even a incontinent bit of filth would marry him? ....
Surely an imposter.This is just depressing witless and dull.
Don`t bother with it PHITCH.
Bhownagree is funny. This is a tedious prat.
"Bhownagree" at 9:49 said "I find it very unlikely that Hitchens has/ had a wife. Surely not even a incontinent bit of filth would marry him?"
1. I did not make this post. Accept no substitutes!
2. The second sentence is not a question, but an assertion, and requires a full stop. I am often guilty of typographical error, but such a solecism, perpetrated in my name, demands exposure.
Mr Newmania - I said he did not qualify as pond-life, so cannot with justice be accused of coarseness.
The comments in this blog are often libellous and I wonder that Google has not been complained to or moved to act. Free speech is one thing, but ignorant and prejudiced ranting is quite another.
Mr Praguetory -- What do you mean by "one of us"? Do you mean the narrow-minded and mean-spirited clique who come here to expectorate? I am not one of "you", then; rather, I see it as my duty to hold up a mirror in which your collective visages, in all their spiritual ugliness, may be descried.
Ah me, what has happened to the English? At one time the middle classes engaged in polite and reasoned debate. We did not find it necessary to shout at one another, or swear like fishwives, or resort to ad hominem attacks.
If I poke fun at you, provoke and exaggerate, it is because it is so irresistibly easy to do.
yes bhown
Fuck of you twat!
leave my ex almost husband out of this.
Peter Hitchens died this evening , show some respect you low life.
I dont know what I shall do with myself.
Any suggestions boys? (+;
I'm no daft.
And therefore,since I cannot prove a lover,
To entertain these fair well-spoken days,--
I am determined to prove a villain,
And hate the idle pleasures of these days.
Plots have I laid, inductions dangerous,
By drunken prophecies, libels, and dreams,
To set young Dave Cameron and the Ming
In deadly hate the one against the other:
I might call a snap election next year, but only if I'm as sure as I can be I'll win. Since like every new prime minister I'll get a honeymoon popularity bounce, and if the election is called soon enough, the Tories, lumbered with a second-rate apprentice Blair and no policies, will offer up a landslide to myself.
The LibDems will never make a pact with Tories, and after my landslide I won't need them.
Bhownagree - you completely missed the point - and I'm not Mr Praguetory you idiot. Just wanted to get that off my chest.
I know what you mean Praguetory but if Mr. B`s motives for enticing the boys to be nasty to him are not entirely un-mixed, I `m sure we can allow him his private pleasures. For how long will this happy state of personal immorality be allowed to persist . I read only today of a new twist in the evil Nu lab knot . CCTV for the home! Of the worlds 4,000,000 units we have a prodigious 20% already and now , aching with feigned sanctimony they wish to protect citizens in danger of abuse …they say. In whose opinion and when will self abuse be equally spied upon.
At this point I suspect Bhownagree to tap timorously on the door and with a trembling lip seek admission to our enlightened band of brothers .
There is a blue rosette for you old B and the dimly lit mirror will show your ravaged features well .
Thank goodness you're back, Peter Hitchen.
Happy New Year.
Tell the bloody Blair Clan to stay with the fucking Gibbs.
Send a card to the Husseins for their sad loss.
And tell Tony Bliar to bugger off.
Fine work on Dansey Julian !! (see blog )
When I think what fuss there was about a a few innocent questions and a bundle of fivers here and there....oh so many years ago.
Brown will not call a snap election - Labour backbenchers want to go the full term so they can claim their full pensions, they know they will be losing their seats, so GB will have to dance to their tune.
Whoops !!
Sorry Peter I forgot the s on the end of your surname.
Hello Peter Hitchens, Happy New Year.
JUDITH-Brown will not call a snap election
No but he will want to go before the boundary commission boosts the Blues by forty seats and the "Scottish problem" ends the Labour party as a serious prospect for governement forever.
They have embroiled the boundary changes in some Balls related enquiry. Thats the key and on 40% with a fair seat allocation we can "PREPARE FOR GOVERNMENT"
He can`t wait the full term
(Didn`t a Liberal say "Prepare for Governement" once..as a joke obviously
Bhownagree said...
Mr Praguetory -Ah me, what has happened to the English? At one time the middle classes engaged in polite and reasoned debate. We did not find it necessary to shout at one another, or swear like fishwives, or resort to ad hominem attacks.
10:39 PM
I think that the middle classes still do but any class can get internet access nowadays.
Judith, Brown WILL call a snap election if he's sure he can win, and if he does that Labour backbenchers will not be losing their seats. They'll love him.
And Windmill Dave will be out in the cold....
I didn't die this evening, I've been brain dead for years.
I hear Doughty Street is moving up a gear in January, that looks to be easily the main contender for point 5. Hasn't been mind-blowing yet but they're still tinkering with it - think of the potential.
We all know about 18DS plans. Guido's got to mean more than that though - I think number 5 is Guido's punt. Even without being able to name specifics, I think it's a reasonable call.
Guido's punt? He's up shit creek without a paddle(+;
A new hope; Dave's been reading Guido
Brown cast as Labour's 'dark side'
http://www.guardian.co.uk/uklatest/story/0,,-6312744,00.html
DC: "2007 will be the year that Labour's dark side comes to the fore."
I'm with you on 2, 3, and 4, but not 5. YOu've been teasing us with #1 for months now.
New media isn't so new anymore, and unless you can totally OWN coverage of a new and important breaking scandal, your numbers (along with other political bloggers) will increase steadily but not to enough of an extent to actually cut into any meatspace media's profit margins. Eventually they'll all go online, it's true, but this thought doesn't terrify them, they just think it's going to happen later rather than sooner.
http://www.sundaymirror.co.uk/news/tm_headline=reid-to-take-on-gordon-&method=full&objectid=18356611&siteid=62484-name_page.html
REID TO TAKE ON GORDON 'EXCLUSIVE'
By Vincent Moss Political Editor
JOHN Reid will this week deliver his clearest hint yet that he is ready to take on Gordon Brown for the Labour leadership after Tony Blair quits.
David Cameron will holiday with Paris Hilton leaving Steve Hilton facing litigation for impersonation
18DS is smug chattering class tellie for beltway folks. It fails to connect with the ordinary working people DC rightly identifies as critical to the NuCons success. Sad to say TM an ID are not natural presenters and it shows - painfully. 18DS needs to (and could)be more than an ego-wank for self selecting self-regarding political class tossers. It needs to be more accessible, more controversial and more self confident. More Nick Ferrari/Richard Littlejohn/Fox TV than the dull dull dull worthy crap it streams to an audience of erm hundreds...
I worry about the teas time for Teddy bears atmosphere on 18 D street in which Telly Tubby brain Rachel fits snuggly. The Conservative Party is abandoning its working class support. There may be few votes and fewer seats but with nothing but Liberal salad drizzled with a light environmental vinaigrette its all a little tasteless
The soul of the Party is with the “forgotten decents”. The working class mean and women who marry and work despite the states endless attack .Who see their idle neighbours out earning them who watch their BMW`s park at night and live with their nocturnal drug fuelled life styles. These are our friends in need , these and the heroic leaseholders bivouacked in the dangerous border territory. Surcharged and doctrinally abused .Perhaps the Dale pretence that you can like someone who talks crap should be dropped..
More terror attacks in UK will force Bliar's hand this year
Attacks against US interests in the UK will scupper his already badly tarnished rep in the great satan.
Insolvencies will come home to roost for G Brown this year, being PM wont help him. Parts of the economy will go into serious reverse, retail, considered purchases etc.
Peter H will be filmed bumming Opik
Long live the Iraqi resistance.
Opic is too old for my taste, I prefer going to Spain and Sweden where the age of consent is 12(+;
>The comments in this blog are often libellous and I wonder that Google has not been complained to or moved to act. Free speech is one thing, but ignorant and prejudiced ranting is quite another.
Do grow up ffs.
People like you are whats wrong with this country.
"I dont like what the nasty man said, I want something done about it".
Why don't you switch off your computer, put it back in its box and stick to reading newspapers?
gordon's strangely brown: This is old news. You obviously have not read on my blog where I announced weeks ago that I was prepared to take on Gordon Brown in a leadership contest.
I note Im being cloned by hirst the granny basher, carry on stalking me hirst I would love to report you to the police for harassment and get you recalled to jail (+:
I know you aren't very bright, but try and understand, anything you do on that pc of yours is permanently logged
Damn, Hitchens, you shouldn't have warned JHL. I was really hoping he'd hang himself, given enough rope. My prediction for 2007 is JHL going back to prison.
BNP does rather well in the local elections after more Labour/establishment types bleat on about their rise. More pressure to ban the BNP from the "chattring classes."
Economy will start to show signs of teetering.
peter hitchins: LOL.
Hitchens we all know "Hitchins" postings are made by the unrepentent Old Lady killer. FFS do not acknowledge this slimebag's existence. His current minor celebrity bought with an Old Lady's blood seems to give him no end of smug satisfaction. Do not engage with this vermin posturing as a member of the human race.
The Stevens Report into the crash in Paris.
Easy to take apart. Here
http://rigorousintuition.ca/board/viewtopic.php?t=9454&start=60
Happy New Year Guido and commentariat!
John
1 Blair secretly rewarded for his part in the biggest theft in history: viz; the transfer of funds from the American taxpayer and holders of US dollars to US army, contractors and other such filth. Also, rewarded for enabling the theft of huge quantities of oil from Iraq (US$700 million / month). All done under the pretense of war.
2 Saddam - I was Churchill's double - Hussein will be spotted in Georgia; photographed etc but no one will belief the evidence. The neocon created reality will continue uninterrupted. Any detractors will be dismissed as cranks.
3 Brown's economy will crash due to a house price fall, followed by interest rate rise (ie fractional reserve works both ways). No one will put two and two together and realise that not including house prices in inflation is directly responsible for huge money expansion. (As is, of course, fiat currency but ...) The pieces will thus remain in place for a repeat performance in a few years time.
4 In short, business as usual. UK political sensibilities defined by the catch phrase, "I'm not boffered."
I note that the trolls are out in force.
My predictions for the New Year are that Parliament will pass legislation to allow all convicted prisoners the postal vote. And, that the Tories will continue to be a weak opposition.
My fans will be pleased to hear that I will be returning to prison to give lectures, as my good friend the Director General of the Prison Service, Phil Wheatley has asked me, and the pay's good aswell!
I suppose it is the price of fame being in demand for the good work I have done in the area of prison reform.
peter hitchens: As you say, an IQ of 155 is not very bright. If you got your head out of your arse the world would look brighter. Only a real person can suffer harrassment, not some figment of your imagination and only exists in the unreal world of the blogosphere. You get me recalled? That only happens when someone is a genuine risk to the public, ie, a link to the index offence. Keep taking the tablets, you may get better soon. Happy New Year.
I certainly agree with most of these, particularly No 5 as I have been following the US experience and we usually follow their lead.
Happy New Year to you Guido, it was great meeting you earlier this month. Onward and upward, I say. I hope Lembit will give us a few more laughs.
Brown will sweep into power an announce that all tax allowances are to be means-tested and available only to Scottish single mothers with unemployed parents.
A new army of 5-a-day outreach coordinators will be hired to visit families in disadvantaged areas of Glasgow and distribute citrus fruit. After the scheme becomes a success it will be rolled out nationally.
Smoker re-education camps will be opened throughout England. People smoking in semi-enclosed areas such as bus stops will be forced to spend their weekends looking at PowerPoint presentations of black lungs being dissected and smelling jars of wet dog-ends.
Tax on alcohol will be doubled and all 'buy 2 glasses get the bottle free' offers will be made illegal. High-Volume Drinking Awareness Outreach Coordinators will be given powers to enter residential premises at any time of the day in order to establish how many units you have consumed that week and distribute literature to promote awareness into issues surrounding binge-drinking where appropriate.
Drivers will be required to have a government GPS system fitted to their cars. Any infringement of the national speed limits will automatically result in £60 being debited from your nominated bank account.
A government hotline will be rolled out nationally encouraging environmentalists to spoach through their neighbours dustbins and grass up anyone who is not recycling their waste plastics, glass and metals. Bin-men will now be accompanied by a Environmental Sustainability Enforcement Officer who will hand out fixed penalty notices to householders who have not disposed of their recyclables appropriately.
Steven_l
You missed out....
Due to their special needs , all adult babies can claim rocking horses , bonnets and over sized nappies as tax deductables. not only that but grants will be available to buy the above for any scotsman over the age of 50.
True true Steven L and happy new year to you . Difn`t you predict an Ashes win for England a while ago , yes , in fact i may find it to show how much we should value your soothesaying
Recall of Lifer to prison:
Your licence may be revoked if your behaviour shows that you are no longer safe to stay in the community. This might be because you have been charged with an imprisonable offence, or behaved in a way similar to that which led to you committing the original offence.
Prisoners Information Handbook.
julian: thank you for telling me something I already know and confirming it for the Muppet Show on this blog!
"This might be"
its an open deal, if you are considered likely to offend and "you are no longer safe to stay in the community."
Well, i am no Lawyer, jailhouse or otherwise, but the above suggests to me that any lifer out on license who is making others feel unsafe due to his/her behaviour could very well be recalled to prison.
Harassment of a law abiding member of the public by an axe murderer out on license suggests that said axe murderer may not have dealt with his issues and is likely to be dangerous.
if i were to find myself in that position I would be getting in touch with the police force who have responsibility for him.
One of the troubles with psychopaths is that they do not consider the consequences of their actions, combine that with their sense of entitlement and delusions of grandeur and they tend to keep getting themselves into trouble.
peter hitchens: This might be because I am the recognised foremost authority on prison law in the country, and know what I am talking about whereas for yourself I am puzzled to discover what you are good at. I feel sorry that you are a psychopath, it cannot be pleasant for you. My probation officer, and the police, and the Prison service are all glad that I am a proven success. A no account like yourself has no say in the matter. It is sad that blogging gives you a sense of self importance. On the other hand, I made history and became famous for this. I am sorry that you feel so inadequate. Perhaps, you should be yourself instead of impersonating someone else?
Sorry for interrupting the dialogue, but JHL you are NOT famous. You ARE a psychopath; your deeply unpleasant personality has come out, and unfortunately I doubt this nastiness is restricted to blogs.
marjorie proops: Oh, but I am famous, see all my references on Google...
How is Optrex going to get himself involved in a front-page anything?
hirst@6.56
Google references:
198 for jailhouselawyer+hirst. (0.15 seconds)
3,140,000 for dog+shit. (0.14 seconds)
I just hope peter hitchens and jailhouselawyer find some place else where they can bore people early in the new year. Either that or both die.
anon@7.42 Apologies.
I'm neither PH or the other.
anon@7.37
anonymous 7.37: What about the 72,200 for John Hirst prison law?
Anon 742
Hitchens may be a bore re Hirst. But what response is there to a posturing unrepentent murderer who bought his Z celebrity with the blood of his landlady. Why should this or any other blog allow itself to be infested by worthless scum. Read about Hirst and you may understand why some of us refuse to ack that he has any right to be anywhere other than under a rock. FFS this posturing fuckwit is glad of his dishing it out with an axe to a defenceless old woman.Its made him a 'man'. Someone of note. Think about it. If Guido tells me to FO thats his right.
I have seen the references. In particular the article from The Guardian. I repeat, you are NOT famous. Google has links for me, and I am far from famous, so that's nothing to go by. You are a worthless disgrace and you are despised.
only 98% more .. and you equal dog+shit.
John Hirst's response to Bronia Burton's request to bring in some coal:
http://www.guardian.co.uk/crime/article/0,,1949501,00.html
.....but there's still 3,140,000 for dog+shit. That makes you just a tad less famous or should I say infamous. There is a subtle difference y'know.
Man of a decade
It does not fall to many leaders to revolutionise both the constitution and the culture of their country. After William the Conqueror and Oliver Cromwell comes Tony Blair. Like those other great leaders, he has distinguished himself by his contributions to military theory, extending Hitler’s vision of blitzkrieg to lightly armed and fast moving troops and finally to the point where men and vehicles have no armour at all. Yet every soldier is secure in the knowledge that behind him is a small army of civil servants ensuring that he does not waste any money on expensive bullets and such. Thus Tony is able to attack more and more enemies with fewer and fewer soldiers.
So clear has been his political vision that he has developed new ways of governing that have not been seen before. Previous leaders have given priority to ensuring that their nation is self sufficient in energy and food. Only Tony has seen that we can rely for energy on our staunch friends, the Arabs, and that kindly Mr Putin, so we do not have to think about controversial things such as nuclear power stations and can go on covering the countryside with windmills that only work 20% of the time, yet are such a wonderful and ever present monument to our new age of enlightenment. For food we can rely on an even wider circle of friends, such as our historic allies the good old French farmers.
He has eliminated much of the annoyance of parliamentary democracy by delegating the most important decisions to unelected European Commissioners and dealing with the rest from his famous sofa. The MPs are kept quiet with ever more generous payments from the public purse. By sheer hypnotic power, he has lulled the electorate into such a state of trance that it accepts, and regards as normal, levels of taxation that would have induced riots in times past.
He has swept aside the fuddy-duddy old culture, with its boring old writers, composers etc, and replaced it with the completely new celebrity culture that every one can join in. While all those windmills will be his lasting concrete monument (Look on my works, ye mighty, and despair!) his cultural monument will be the reality TV show.
He was ever the man of action. While others fretted about the West Lothian Question, he simply ignored it and drew up a new constitution that involved just one country of the four being denied its own parliament and being forced to subsidise the others, while they were given votes on its affairs. Only Tony realised that the English had become too effete to raise a protest. Likewise, while others wavered about the future of the House of Lords, at a stroke he eliminated the hereditary peers, and hence the main opposition to his glorious vision, replacing them with the right sort and simultaneously overcoming the funding problems of his party. Without the hereditaries’ pathetic concerns about the rights of individuals, he was able to implement vital policies such as the smoking ban and the forthcoming bans on salt consumption and fat people in public places.
Of course, his great political war cry was “Education, education, education” and this is where he has wrought the greatest changes. He has, for example, managed to close down most university departments of Physics, which were always nests of opposition to Good Green Science, while achieving world domination in Media Studies. In schools he has pressed on with the everybody passes principle, so that no one knows who is academically able, which is as it should be. At the same time he has achieved a rebalance of the sexes by feminising the education system. The alienation of many boys and the creation of gangs of feral youths is a small price to pay for the advance of women.
His greatest achievement, however, is to oblige the Conservative Party to abandon every principle it ever stood for and put up a pale imitation of himself as an alternative. That is true greatness!
26/12/06
http://www.numberwatch.co.uk/2006%20December.htm
I hope Guido will take some action over the constant nuisance. It is entirely clear who is to blame and it is not those who are understandably affronted by JHL. I wish to return to wit and politics .
If nothing is done then there are other blogs.
Bhownagree,
ref apricotangent@8.31: I thought you said your big brother had "gone away". Why is he back in the "community"? Do you have his lithium?
Anon. 8:40
"Bhownagree" was a hoax, but "Bhownaggree" will come back some day, mark my words.
For fuck's sake Guido sort the comments out!
Ralph said...
"Anon. 8:40:"Bhownagree" was a hoax, but "Bhownaggree" will come back some day, mark my words."
You've got it the wrong way round.
Jailhousetosser, axe murderer of old ladies, a pathetic twat who apparently thinks he's famous, is on here calling other people "trolls".
Maybe he got an irony bypass thrown in for free with the ethical one.
Happy new year :
Its just your jive talkin
Youre telling me lies, yeah
Jive talkin
You wear a disguise
Jive talkin
So misunderstood, yeah
Jive talkin
You really no good
Oh, my child
Youll never know
Just what you mean to me
Oh, my child
You got so much
Youre gonna take away my energy
With all your jive talkin
Youre telling me lies, yeah
Good lovin
Still gets in my eyes
Nobody believes what you say
Its just your jive talkin
That gets in the way
Oh my love
Youre so good
Treating me so cruel
There you go
With your fancy lies
Leavin me lookin
Like a dumbstruck fool
With all your
Jive talkin
Youre telling me lies, yeah
Jive talkin
You wear a disguise
Jive talkin
So misunderstood, yeah
Jive talkin
You just aint no good
Love talkin
Is all very fine, yeah
Jive talkin
Just isnt a crime
And if theres somebody
Youll love till you die
Then all that jive talkin
Just gets in your eye
Jive talkin
Youre telling me lies,yeah
Good lovin
Still gets in my eyes
Nobody believes what you say
Its just your jive talkin
That gets in the way
Love talkin
Is all very fine, yeah
Jive talkin, just isnt a crime
And if theres somebody
Youll love till you die
Then all that jive talkin
Just gets in your eye
Hitchens is a first-rate chap. No bore is he. Indeed, Hitch is well-regarded throughout the blogosphere for his rhetorical skill and trenchant insight. except for Dave Cameron where Hitch is just plain wrong. Frankly, PHITCHophobes are scum in extremis. And a happy new year to one and all...
Hijacked by the mentally ill.
This Blog is so over.
RIP
au contraire It's Stayin' Alive
tb bg < dog+shit
Just dropped by, can't stop, byeeeeeEEEEEEEEEE!
cause were living in a world of fools
Breaking us down
When they all should let us be
We belong to you and me
Poor Tony: When you lose control and you got no soul
Its tragedy
Just as a sideline to current irrelevance may I wish you all a Happy 2007 and may we all live in interesting times this year, as I am sure Mr Blair will and Mr Hussein just failed to ...
Im a tad rat-arsed yes, but one fact about the coming political year is indeed carved in stone.
The rag bag dole scroungers, the disability army, & feckless filth will continue to support Neo Labour, despite the numbers of poor people slaughtered in the sovereign nation once known as EYERACK.
No matter how low this wretched shower stoop, they can always rely on weighing votes in the Northern Metropolis shyteholes, and similar blasted wasteland estates of North & East London and also Essex.
Hopefully at least significant numbers of Labour Drones who have seats in semi rural constituencies will be facing political oblivion.
If the tories don't start polling really strongly in the Kent constituencies held in Labour's grip, Cameroon will come under real pressure. If the working class people of the Thanets etc don't begin buying into DC, the right wing knives will be glinting.
How many MP's use class A drugs?
Quite a number.
How many MPs use class A drugs? I'm sure it is quite a number. I am equally sure that quite a lot of blog commenters do as well.
Girlyboy, I was on classA AND catA before you were born.
Master Fawkes,
Far be it from me to try and tell you how to run your blog, but if I may, a small request for the New Year:
Please bang some of the children's heads together. Their bickering is starting to make reading the comments tiresome.
Other than that, please carry on the good work and may the New Year bring you yet more (in)famy.
Its no good there is no point in this place any more.
Goodbye Guido
Having just read through the above comments I must say they were rather amusing. A bit like politicalbetting.com without the mutual masturbation. Keep up the good work, you guys, and let Guido have a well-earned break. No doubt normal service will be resumed as soon as the political pond-life floats back up to the surface.
Anonymous said... 7:42 PM
"I just hope peter hitchens and jailhouselawyer ... Either that or both die."
Please god, yes.
Four predictions:
1. A lot of people on the "Arab Street" will tell us that Saddam was never executed, it was all faked by the Americans, an actor was used, the real Saddam is living in Brazil, etc. etc.
2. The Government, under the guise of cost control, will emasculate the Freedom of Information Act.
3. Voices on the left will urge the government to "regulate" internet blogs.
4. Sadly, Guido, your blog will attract ever fewer postings, as it is increasingly taken over by the tinfoil hat brigade.
I thought everyone was going to ignore JHL. Perhaps he will then get bored and go away.
Perhaps he will then get bored and go away.
I think you speak for many.He spreads misery wherever he goes. What a pointless life
I wish Guido would just ban JHL. He's abhorrent.
Ignore the trolls JHL. I can tell that you are a caring, sensitive chap, and would like to take this opportunity to wish you a Happy New Year.
...I `m gonna sit right down and write myself a letter. Sums it up.
Lets all try to pretend he does not exist. If not ...go elsewhere
Lay off poor Lembit. After being the only Lib Dem MP stupid enough to back Mark Oaten for Leader (even before the brown stuff hit the fan!) he is now just drifting into a mid-life crisis before he is fired towards alpha centuri in a search for intelligent life.
Goege Osbourne feel my bum!
"My probation officer, and the police, and the Prison service are all glad"
margorie, JHL is just a narcissist - like Blair, Cameron and Kennedy only a bit worse. let's just be glad that the three of them don't come on here polluting with their self-aggrandising drivel.
Did Guido predict the happenstances of the last year? I cannot locate the post for 01/01/06. Did it see the light of day? Was it deleted to avoid tarnishing the good Guy's political mystique?
Guido groupies need to know.
re 4. Sadly, Guido, your blog will attract ever fewer postings, as it is increasingly taken over by the tinfoil hat brigade.
A conclusion is the point at which you stop thinking
quotes of the year?
"I could murder a pie"
Cherie Blair's verdict on Gordon's conference sppech.
“I have never known how mendacious [Brown] was, how full of mendacity.” Tony Blair
Tony Falsetto (contd)
How deep is your love... for your self...for yourself..
Nobody gives a monkeys...
'Cos you're living in a world of dreams
And you ought to let it be
Self-destruct along with Cherie....
I'd welcome JHL's absence because he provokes loud-mouthed, self-righteous arseholes like Hitchens. Otherwise what JHL has done is irrelevant to this blog and can v. easily be discussed elsewhere by those excited and interested by it.
Mottles 2.39 “I have never known how mendacious [Brown] was, how full of mendacity.” Tony Blair
They say it takes one to know one.
Please go away JHL you are sucking the life from this blog .Please please go away .
"massofchewsetsssssss..."
Quote of the year:
"Twice a year Gordon Brown fills his party's sails with pride. His tornado of facts and figures magics up images of untold national wealth and success. Standing at the dispatch box, the towering superiority of his brain makes intellectual pygmies of his opponents"
Polly Toynbee ONB Private Eye
GEEKY AND HIS CHEEKY
"according to Cheeky Mum Margit, it's lurve. Speaking exclusively to us of her 24-year-old's romance, Margit laughed: "She is so happy. All the Romanians back home think it's wonderful and say Father Christmas has bought Gabriela an MP."
http://www.mirror.co.uk/3am/tm_headline=geeky-and-his-cheeky%26method=full%26objectid=18360672%26siteid=94762-name_page.html
'Migrationwatch' are predicting that any significant reduction in their previously predicted flood of immifrants to the UK from Romania will be entirely due to the wide-promulgation of rumours in Bucharest that being placed legs -a-kimbo at the mercy of the MP for Montgomery is part of the official immigration procedures. For females, that is - the males are placed at the mercy of Mark Oaten
javelin said...
I would like to make my top 5 predictions.
1) That they will find the number of foreign born prisoners has tripled under New Labour (according to my cousin who runs a well known prisoner charity), and that Gordon Brown has not funded new prisons or probation services and he has allowed dangerous criminals on the street because the waves of new prisoners have pushed them out. Gordon is trying to privatise the probation service to escape blame for not protecting the public.
2) That Gordon Brown has issued over 820,000 National Insurance Cards (that give free access to schooling and health care) without any checks being made. According to my Uncle who runs a branch of the Treasury.
3) That Gordon Brown has given many, mny billions to large accounting, software, legal, weapon consultancies who has allowed a systemic oligopoly at the heart of most Government departments - whereby consultants (salesmen) work permanently "helping" the ministers to allocate contracts to which Gordon pays without question - according to a friend who works for Microsoft in such a job.
4) That figure will emerge showing that Gordon Brown has allocated more money to New Labour heartlands than has previously been admitted. This will lead to a rise in the number of people calling for an English Parliament - and that politicians will ignore it.
5) That Gordon Brown's inflation figures will come under increasing scrutiny as being an irrelevant measure of inflation. As the world economy continues to grow - and be held back by limited resources, with consequential increases in inflation and interest rates his boasts that he decided to form the BofE committee will become sullied as both they and Gordon argue about who is responsible for defining what inflation is. Rates will be at least 1% higher at the end of the year, with the first .25% rise coming in February. Gordon will blame everybody but himself for the rise in inflation.
and....
6)the UK house price bubble finally bursts ending the debt-fuelled spending boom that has kept Brown's enron economy afloat.
7) We get to see the infamous Brown on the rocking horse photos
Anonymous said...
.... the males are placed at the mercy of Mark Oaten
You mean they're forced to shit in his gob?
Bloody hell, anonymous 4.27! It seems like HM government is part of your private family firm. When did your lot first give Blair holiday hospitality?
"this age of Blair was, for many, also an age of plenty. For the working, home-owning majority, the past decade has been a time of ever greater self-enrichment. On the back of rocketing property prices, low inflation and easy credit, the British have travelled the world and filled their homes with gizmos that would have made Nero or Louis XIV goggle with envy."
http://www.guardian.co.uk/commentisfree/story/0,,1980874,00.html
Jackie Ashley 'GET READY FOR A GUST OF OPTIMISM ON
ALL FRONTS'
" It is going to be good not because Gordon Brown will alight from his chariot and save the Labour party - though I hope he does "
If anyone wants to know what a whoopee cushion which bursts at both ends is like, you only have to send out for Ashley-Marr!
Both so far up the Noolabor passage that they remind one of Mark oaten on a bad hair day.
In the rush of politicians to re-brand themselves as 'going back to our roots', John Prescot and Mark Oaten will, upon cessation of membership of the lower house, collaborate in a production of "Boys from the Brown Stuff", a hair-raising adventure of life on the political right of David Cameron. Predictions that Prescot will have dyed on his first night are pouring in.
Incidentally, who IS ruining/running this country while Blair is off playing swampie?
I wish I could be involved in a front page scandal preferably with one or both of the cheeky girls or a weather lady with good teeth...
What's in store for 2007?
The BNP to treble their councillors in the May local elections mainly due to mass defections of angry and disaffected white working-class former Labour voters.
Tories to go over 10 points into the lead over Labour in the polls.
Brown's ponzi scheme aka the UK economy, comes off the rails leading to recession, mass unemployment, house price crash, bankruptcies, repos, etc.
Taxes up to pay for increased public spending and public sector wage rises after Unison militancy.
Growing backlash against immigration, crime, corruption and other consequences of Labour's ten years in power.
More cracks appear in the "multi-cultural" experiment as Britain becomes increasingly Balkanised.
The pound collapses on the foreign exchanges against the euro, the yen and the renminbi. Calls increase to ditch sterling and join the safe haven of the euro.
Social unrest, crime, drug/alcohol abuse, increases.
Did anyone see Champagne Charlie Kennedy on "Celeb Who's a Wannabe Millionaire"?
Paired up with a bit of well-wearing Murdoch tottie - each equally as dim as the other. Packed in after all his lifelines had gone and still couldn't define 'Psyche'. I always thought a Lib Dem leader might have a wide grasp of the terminology for describing our souls!!!.
Beware the Ides of Ming!
Did anyone see Champagne Charlie Kennedy on "Celeb Who's a Wannabe Millionaire"?
For about two minutes. God, weren't they boring?
Limpdick O'Prik's increasingly erratic and arrogant behaviour followed by further revelations about his private life leads to his deselection.
Good feckin riddance.
bleugh:
JAckie Ashley: "Gordon Brown will alight from his chariot and save the Labour party"
What are they on at the Gordian these days?
The Gordian
Maybe they're i-pods are stuck on repeat:
" Things can only get better..."
Or, as they sing in the Lib Dems:
"Thongs can only get buttered"
Anon 6.48 are you 'the only fascist in the village'?
Saddam: The First Makings of a Conspiracy Theory
Trumpeter is right about one thing: there will be conspiracy theories about Saddam's execution. Moreover the "full" video does nothing to disprove any such theory.
1. Whether the government paid a professional (The Guardian) or both videos are amateur (the short video is from a different angle) the quality of the long video can only be the result of ineptitude or careful planning.
2. The long videoer frequently loses focus on the subject and points his camera at the floor or the stairs.
3. However, for key moments (from a conspiracy theorist's point of view) his hands suddenly become remarkably steady e.g. just before the drop.
4. For other key moments he goes back to filming metal plate e.g. just after the drop and before Saddam has fallen far enough for you to see how far he actually drops.
5. He then stays out of focus long enough for the scene on the floor to have been arranged after Saddam's fall was broken in some manner (a platform? a safe pair of arms?).
6. The insults and the rebuke of one of the insulters can be explained as simple theatrics designed to make it appear convincing.
7. If the video was government sponsored that simply adds to the mystery: why choose an inept cameraman and film with such bad lighting? Answer: because they would have needed a top flight big stunt magician to have carried it off in daylight or in a well lit room.
8. Contrary to some reports Saddam looks perfectly calm, just as if he knows it's all playacting and he is not really going to die!
When the real conspiracy theorists get to work 2007 will see many more elaborate versions of the above posted on the net. If there is a prize for the most accurate prediction I think I'm on a winner here.
She said: "There was such a build-up of desire and a huge explosion between us. Lembit was very gentle and passionate, his hands all over my body.
"And the more we make love, the better it gets.
Big chin. . . biig hands. . . biiig. . .
(well we knew that anyway, he supported Oaten for leader!)
You are right mgic Steven. Saddam and princess Di are actually shacked up at Conrad Black's place in Canada, together with Dodi's love-child who Saddam has adopted.
What I would really love to see is a photograph of lembits face taken from "underneath" as in from the point of view of the cheeky girl he services.
Try it yourselves, put a mirror on a flat surface lean over it and see what you look like to the lady you are fucking. If you are over the age of 30 I guarantee that you will never again look her in the face whilst on the job without thinking
"I know what Im getting out of this, but what's in it for you?"
Maybe that explains why so many LibDems go in for backdoor action.
Peter H, I take your point (or rather, I don't!) but surely in Lembit's case that chin obscures all?
OBN said...
bleugh:
JAckie Ashley: "Gordon Brown will alight from his chariot and save the Labour party"
shouldn't that read "alight from his rocking-horse"?
Anonymous said...
Anon 6.48 are you 'the only fascist in the village'?
Is that you Limpdick?
I fear not sire, and would suggest that your choice of moniker belies the only aspect of the meteor-watching Ulsterman which might appeal to the tight-arsed ones from Carpathia. Indeed he's probably somewhere 'exercising' the appendage right now. After all, it's not likely to be for too long!
To clarify, anonymous (7:40 pm), I did not say I thought Saddam was not killed. I simply said that the film did not prove that he was. I went on to say that conspiracy theorists would make hay while the sun shines. A public execution would have solved the problem. Now the Iraq government faces decades of speculation and enquiry on a par with JFK and the grassy knoll and, indeed, as you rightly mention, Princess Dianna and the car crash. Conrad Black, who you also mention, is in an entirely different category:
1. He is undoubtedly alive;
2. He is the subject of both criminal and civil proceedings; and
3. He will have the right to and will defend himself with the best lawyers money can buy.
Why would you mention Conrad Black in the same context as the others? Are you a fan and believe he is being persecuted rather prosecuted under due process?
The Final Steps to abolish the UK start in March 07
http://eutruth.org.uk
Well, Canada's anti-capital punishment, but we might make an exception for Conrad. Mostly, though, we're with Rick Mercer, who says we should allow him to regain his citizenship, and then we should never, ever, for even a moment, allow him to forget it.
Well, raincoaster, I am wholly opposed to capital punishment. This includes Conrad Black. That inclusion just shows how serious I am about not killing people even if they are transparently innoccent, like, you know, Mr Black. Gosh, his lawyers are low sleepers and fast workers. CONRAD BLACK IS INNOCENT. I absolutely deny the truth of anything I said before this sentence.
"You are right mgic Steven. Saddam and princess Di are actually shacked up at Conrad Black's place in Canada, together with Dodi's love-child who Saddam has adopted."
In every film made where there has been a hanging scene (eg Polanski's Macbeth) the actor always, died.
I think it's time you started charging Guido - you really need to ration access to weed out the undesirables. Let the plebs have access to older posts whilst serious commentators prepared to pay good money have access to a more elevated discussion on the breaking news.
Labour will be lucky to come third in the next election, maybe not for the reasons we all want but it will happen anyway.Tax, immigrants and the war have made Labour an embarrassment to the politically disinterested majority. The millions of people who frankly couldnt give a F**k about politics have already decided that they will not vote Labour. This vast group of voters do not care what Brown says or does. This group of voters (not the middle class, middle ground, concerned, eco-baffled tools Cameron is hiding behind)cannot be hoodwinked because they simply dont read the politics pages, they dont care who is actually in government because they know they are all the same, they simply act as the brake when the politicians completely lose touch with reality and start believing their own farcical propaganda. It took them years to realise Maggie had left then they allowed NuLabour in because they seemed fairly tame and the Tories had wasted years after the economic reforms had been implemented.Nobody voted NuLabour into power because there was nothing to vote for, no radical agenda, no vision, no goals, no moronic left wing policies, just another ambitious posh tool who wasnt a Tory.
These people do not vote tactically or give a toss that their local MP is an utter disgrace, who votes against the view of his constituents or even know their name;they simply curb the excesses by either abstaining (preferred option) or begrudgingly dragging themselves down the local school hall, missing either Corrie, Eastenders,Cash in the Attic, or that thing on BBC2 that looked quite good) once every 5 years if something has annoyed them particularly strongly(TAX,TAX,TAX bloody asylum seekers,one of the government didnt cry at Dianas funeral etc).
This may all seem rather negative but its not, it presents the greatest opportunity for the Conservative Party; if you know you are going to win anyway why not get a proper mandate? Yes David, all the things we know you really believe in, know need to be done but have been too afraid to mention in case it means we lose the Chipping Gorton North key marginal (with unpopular A list PC, townie) as a consequence of having offended some influential local do gooder?
Whilst clearly it is the greatest issue of our time (which is lucky given everyone is trying to hide behind it)but the effing climate will still be there in 2 years time, but meanwhile 3000 PEOPLE, not lesser-spotted warblers,are being KILLED each month in a stupid, illegal,war that we have already lost is going on with your support. Take a step back and work out which one will get apathetic voters off their arses and out to actually vote FOR you instead of AGAINST the doomed losers currently in power.
Ihave ben shocked at the number of Tory (and clueless early Bliar fans) who now openly support the BNP,UKIP,etc. These group offer NO threat to the Tory party fortunes at the next election, they might cost you a few a seats here and there, but in the scheme of things they ARE irrelevent. For the very simple reaon that if you cannot beat these utterly discredited muppets by a landslide and are worried about a few seats in order to head a Tory government then you will have lost anyway. The opportunity is there to end the phoney war on policies; tell the people the serious and major elements of your policies if elected. The issues that are utmost in voters minds are;
Europe - It is UNPOPULAR on a scale only politicians seem unable to see,fundementally flawed in design, illegal in operation and wholly undemocratic.If you could only see yourselves preaching about political engagement and spreading of democratic values when you support this disgrace.
Iraq - If you really want to support the troops get Blair into parliament to explain his strategy for our troops and their well being, when he fails to turn up/tell the truth/asks the Caravaning Ken Dodd lool-a-like to stand in for him you have the excuse you need to with draw your support.Lib DEms 22% and rising anti-war - Blair international criminal and Labour down the tubes. You work it out, oh and by the way - everyone knows its Blairs war and its pointless, we all support the troops and would have them home tomorrowWE HAVE ALREADY LOST.Why supports it? what possible benefit is to be had from supporting this??? Seeing our troops die for no reason never won a vote in the UK.
How controversial are these issues really? they have the added benefit of being POPULAR amongst the VOTERS. Clearly that is a concept politicians struggle with,even if the public ae wrong and pulling out turns out to be the wrong thing to do and BUsh was right all along. Our wrst case outcome is we save our troops from death and injury.
F**k me even Ming Campbell got this one right!
Myrddin Wen said..."The Final Steps to abolish the UK start in March 07 ... http://eutruth.org.uk "
My God! You actually believe this crap!!!!!
quotes of the year:
"Disgraced Lib-Dem MP Mark Oaten owns a springer spaniel called Coco." (Cut to photo of Oaten walking Coco) "There he is, the frisky little bottom sniffer... with Coco." - Trevor McDoughnut (Have I Got News For You)"
http://www.mirror.co.uk/tvandfilm/shelleyvision/tm_headline=quotes-of-2006-%26method=full%26objectid=18364447%26siteid=94762-name_page.html
I should coco!
Lembit Opik NOT on the front page is a scandal. At least it won't spoil PAGE 3 for me.
For Pete's sake, Fawkes, switch the damn moderation on. The lunatics are killing this blog.