What shall we do with the drunken LibDem leader? What shall we do with the drunken LibDem leader? What shall we do with the drunken LibDem leader? Er-lie in the morning?
Put him in the spotlight with the cameras on him, Put him in the spotlight with the cameras on him, Put him in the spotlight with the cameras on him, etc.
I’m from Kirkcaldy and Cowdenbeath I look kinda deep but there’s nothing underneath And they all shout out on Hampstead Heath Hey Gordon where’s yer scruples?
Chorus Let the wind blow high, let the wind blow low I’ll bend with the wind where’er it blows, And all the Lobby say - hello Gordon, where’s yer scruples?
I’ve been Chancellor noo for many a year But I’ve always slagged off Tony Blair I brief against him withoot fear And ye cannae do that with scruples!
(Chorus)
When I screwed up on the Benefits front I didnae wish to look a **** So I pushed Primarolo oot in front For I havnae any scruples!
(Chorus)
Prime Minister I yurrn to be Nuclear power? the top-up fee? War in Iraq? they’re fine with me I’ll support them without scruples!
(Chorus)
When I’m in Number 10 at last Will I do what’s right for the wurrking class? They can stick a Trident up their arse If they think that I’ve got scruples!
(Chorus)
October 23, 2006 at 12:52 PM
Anonymous
said...
David Cameron announced the transformation of the Conservative party was now complete with the performance of the Conservatives new anthem for the next General Election:-
The people's flag is deepest red, It shrouded oft our martyred dead, And ere their limbs grew stiff and cold, Their hearts blood dyed its every fold. Then raise the scarlet standard high. (chorus) Within its shade we'll live and die, Though cowards flinch and traitors sneer, We'll keep the red flag flying here.
Look round, the Frenchman loves its blaze, The sturdy German chants its praise, In Moscow's vaults its hymns are sung Chicago swells the surging throng.
It waved above our infant might, When all ahead seemed dark as night; It witnessed many a deed and vow, We must not change its colour now.
It well recalls the triumphs past, It gives the hope of peace at last; The banner bright, the symbol plain, Of human right and human gain.
It suits today the weak and base, Whose minds are fixed on pelf and place To cringe before the rich man's frown, And haul the sacred emblem down.
With heads uncovered swear we all To bear it onward till we fall; Come dungeons dark or gallows grim, This song shall be our parting hymn.
Or that other great 1980s classic from the good old FCS (tune by Amazulu)..."Hang Nelson Mandela."
October 23, 2006 at 1:07 PM
Anonymous
said...
Sung to the tune of 'Don't lets be Beastly to the Germans' Oh don't lets be beastly to the Hoodies For Dave thinks they're really rather sweet Oh don't lets be beastly to the Hoddies You must smile when you see one in the street.
Oh we used to hang and flog We would drown em in a bog But now we've changed our stile We'll ge em hugs and smile
Chorus
Oh don't lets be beastly to the hoodie etc
So condemn a little less Understand a little more Invite 'em all inside As their kicking in your dooooor
ChorChors
us
Oh don't let's be beastly to the hoodie etc
We should hang 'em by the thumb red hot pokers up the bumb But Dave he says no Only kindness we must shooooow
chorus
Oh etc
If you can't do a hug You could try a little kiss Or do you think dear Dave is Just taking the Piiiiiiissss
Chorus
OH don't
October 23, 2006 at 1:10 PM
Anonymous
said...
A modest attemot, to be sung to the Beach Boys' "wouldn't it be nice"
Wouldnt it be nice if we were better And not be in opposition for so long And wouldnt it be nice to vote together And send the Trots where they belong
We think Davy’s gonna make it all much better If only he can hold the shadow cabinet together
Wouldnt it be nice if we had an agenda Rather than just a vague tax-cut spenda And now we’ve promised to be green and caring We’ll nick the lib dems plans and give them an airing
Happy times together weve been spending I wish that Bournemouth was neverending Wouldnt it be nice
Maybe if we think and wish and hope and pray it might come true With Davy as PM there would be nothing we couldnt do We’d get some power And oust the Labour shower
Wouldnt it be nice
You know it seems the more we talk about it The more Francis Maude spouts some bullsh*it But lets talk about it Wouldnt it be nice
October 23, 2006 at 1:11 PM
Anonymous
said...
It has to be the Beatles "Nowhere Man"......... original lyrics will suffice.
Gordon Brown, dour and no fun Breaks his rules and his own sums Throughout the City A figure of pity Always a frown with Gordon Brown
Up go deficits and taxes As the Cyclops from Kirkaldy relaxes Won’t talk to Blair Thinks he’s unfair Always a frown with Gordon Brown
Gordon Brown, Enron accounting Over the years the deficit’s mounting PFI deals Granita meals Always a frown with Gordon Brown
Always a frown With Gordon Brown Always a frown With Gordon Brown
October 23, 2006 at 1:15 PM
Anonymous
said...
Ballad to the lib dems:
A yellow bird
A yellow bird
With a yellow bill
With a yellow bill
It landed on
It landed on
My window sill
My window sill
I lured it in
I lured it in
With a piece of bread
With a piece of bread
THEN I STAMPED ALL OVER ITS FUCKING HEAD
October 23, 2006 at 1:15 PM
Anonymous
said...
Stoooooooooooooooooooooooop the bus I need a wee wee, Stop the bus I need a wee wee, Stop the bus I need a wee wee And Soames is stuck in the bog.
(repeat ad infimitum, or until manservant frees portly figure from the pan)
October 23, 2006 at 1:30 PM
Anonymous
said...
Just a thought - one coach is going?
Does this mean all the MPs will be heading off in their jags and not joining in the jolly japes on the bus?
Boo. Bet George Osborne would have a note from his Mum saying he had to sit up front with the teachers to stop him feeling queasy.
October 23, 2006 at 1:36 PM
Anonymous
said...
I dont have any suggestions for a song , I just hope they are involved in a crash and all burn to death. About 50 less leeches in this world.
October 23, 2006 at 1:42 PM
Anonymous
said...
Nick - shouldn't that be ...
"And Soames has blocked up the bog "
October 23, 2006 at 1:49 PM
Anonymous
said...
Ah yes, Paul Linford, I remember that song well.
And I still agree with the idea too.
Happy happy days they were...
October 23, 2006 at 1:49 PM
Anonymous
said...
Hello. Is there anybody in there? Just nod if you can hear me. Is there anyone at home?
Come on, now. I hear you’re feeling down. Well I can ease your pain, Get you on your feet again.
Relax. I need some information first. Just the basic facts: Can you show me where it hurts?
There is no cash, my wallet’s bleeding. I see no tax cuts on the horizon. You are only coming through in waves. Your lips move but I’ve no idea what you’re saying.
When I was a child it all was simple. The left and right like two cartoons. Now I don’t know which is which. You won’t explain, ‘cos I won’t understand. This is now how I am. I have become comfortably dumb.
Ok. Just a little windmill. [swish!] Therell be no more --aaaaaahhhhh! You will learn to love us quick.
Can you stand us? I do believe its working. good. That’ll keep you going just for now. ‘Til the other buggers go.
There is no plan, you are deceiving. Just wishful thinking on the horizon. That we’ll swap Tony’s grin for Dave’s. Your lips move so I can tell that you’re lying. When I was a child I caught a fleeting glimpse, Out of the corner of my eye. I turned to look but it was gone. I cannot put my finger on it now. The child is grown, the dream is gone. I have become comfortably dumb.
Is this their reward for doing such a such a cracking job with the passes at Tory Party Conference this year? I bet all those people who had to stand in queues for hours will be impressed.
Song suggestion: 'Highway to Hell' or 'Road to No Where'.
Well as it will be nearly 3 hours in close comfort going there, likely some one will get murdered...but then cumming back, some one will probably get a shag...
October 23, 2006 at 2:44 PM
Anonymous
said...
as they are going to a football grounhd, i think we've got to stick to a football theme so....
"chim chim er neee, chim chim er neee, chim chim cherooo, we are the bastards who wear rosettes of blue."
or
(to the tune of yellow submarine) "margaret thatcher's dresses stink of piss, dresses stink of piss, dresses stink of piss."
Well you can thump and grind If it's good for your mind Well you can twist and shout Let it all hang out But you won't fool the children of the British nation No you won't fool the children of the British nation No no no Well you can fly in a plane To the arctic plain You can be followed by a Rolls Royce Pretending a bike is your choice But you won’t fool….
October 23, 2006 at 2:49 PM
Anonymous
said...
To the sounds of the Spice Girls' "Spice Up Your Life":
When you're feeling sad and low We will take you where you gotta go Smiling, dancing, everything is free All you need is Tory-tivity
Colours of the world (spice up your life!) Every boy and every girl (spice up your life!) People of the world (spice up your life!) Aah...
Slam it to the Right (if youre having a good time) Suck up to the Left (if you know that you feel fine) Chicas to the front (huh huh) and go round Slam it to the Right (if youre having a good time) Suck up to the Left (if you know that you feel fine) Chicas to the front (huh huh) Hi, see ya, hold tight!
La la la la la la la la la La la la la la la la La la la la la la la la la La la la la la la la
Yellow men in timbuktu Vote for both me and you Hoodie hugging, dancin' queen Tribal redneck and all thats in between
Colours of the world (spice up your life!) [etc.]
Slam it to the Right (if youre having a good time) [etc.]
Robert Maxwell was chairman of Oxford United wasn't he? I can see the connection.
October 23, 2006 at 3:06 PM
Anonymous
said...
"Always look on the bright side of life ?"
Get in the practice now for when the electorate yet again rejects your la-la-land view of the world.
Surely it can be arranged for the driver to take a detour via Beachy Head first, jump out and the critical moment to leave the bus and it's hapless occupants to a happier fate than that which the country has in store for them.
Nick Drew's contribution was just so good I had to bring it to the Lib Dem Blogs audience too.
Top drawer cabaret old chap!
October 23, 2006 at 3:08 PM
Anonymous
said...
What about the old Steeler's Wheel number....
"Clowns to the Left of me, Jokers to the Right, Here I am, Stuck in the middle with you"
October 23, 2006 at 3:19 PM
Anonymous
said...
Cameron's Lament to Blair
[aka Stuck in the Middle by Stealer's Wheels]
Yes I'm stuck in the middle with you, And I'm wondering what it is I should do, It's so hard to keep this smile from my face, Losing control, yeah, I'm all over the place, Clowns to the left of me, Jokers to the right, Here I am, stuck in the middle with you.
etc
October 23, 2006 at 3:26 PM
Anonymous
said...
oh you beat me to it damn you.
October 23, 2006 at 3:28 PM
Anonymous
said...
Send in the clowns.
October 23, 2006 at 3:38 PM
Anonymous
said...
Spice up your life is gooooood.....
October 23, 2006 at 3:49 PM
Anonymous
said...
Lagwolf, I reckon that's why they got 2 hours on a bus to Oxford Utd. If they'd have extracted the digits quicker they might have got a proper jolly.
suggested song: Tina Turner's "we don't need another hero" they could even do mad max like re-enactments...
we are tories we are tories no one likes us we dont care
(to the tune of 'We are sailing')
October 23, 2006 at 4:14 PM
Anonymous
said...
Another humble offering, this one to the tune of Stairway to Heaven....
George Osborne MP, is talking to me And he’s hoping to move to number eleven And if he gets there he knows That he’s going to be worse than Gordon Woe oh oh oh oh oh Yes, he’s going to be worse that Gordon
Theresa May’s got nice shoes but she’s singing the blues Until she gets her bum on the woolsack Leading from the back Cameron hears the sad news That Billy Hague wants his old job back Woe oh oh oh oh oh Billy Vague wants his old job back
There's a feeling I get when I look to the west And I worry for Gillan in Wales- Plaid will lynch the poor dear as her seat aint in Cymru At least Mundell’s seat is in Scotland Woe oh oh oh oh oh At least Mundell’s seat is in Scotland
And it's whispered that soon, if we all call the tune Then young David will lead us to reason And a new day will dawn for those who sing this song And Millbank will echo with laughter And it makes me wonder
If there's a Boris in your bedroom Don't be alarmed now It's just a boffing for the Au Pair
Yes there are two paths you can go by but if your stuck behind Soames There's still no room to overtake him
Your head is throbbing and it won't go because you don't know Why Liam Fox is calling you to join him Dear Tony can't you hear the horns blow and did you know That we’re out to get you
And as we wind on down the road With more loans than cash There walks a lady we all know Who shines white light and wants to show That Margaret Thatcher isnt too old She was tough, she was hard It’s such a shame her time has past When all are one and one is all To be a tory and not to bore Woe oh oh oh oh oh
We’ve all bought our peerages from Levy
October 23, 2006 at 4:33 PM
Anonymous
said...
Joe Taylor - Joe - my pleasure: post a recording of the song if your crew gets round to performing it.
NB I am NOT the Nick Drew who blogs as 'geekland' - just a humble punter. I'm sure you'll send up a smoke signal if you want to get in touch.
Guido - sorry to use you as a message board but old Joe here doesn't allow non-blogs to post chez lui. And he was nice (sort of)about you.
October 23, 2006 at 4:51 PM
Anonymous
said...
All ways look on the brightside of life......du da du da ...........
Don't be silly chumps and sit near the bearded butt fucker of CCHQ ........du da du da.... ...............
If you do you fall victim to an exhale of his terminal breath du da du da du do............
It stinks like shit and is secreted by the gay "faggot" gland in the back of his neck do da du do.
All ways look on the brightside of life....................
The end.
Mincing condutor maude on the trombone.
October 23, 2006 at 5:13 PM
Anonymous
said...
I have been trying to sing the one thats suppossed to be to the tune of Stairway To Heaven and its quite impossible, there are either too many or too few words on each line, and it is impossible to sing peerages from Levy in a Robert Plant-like way.
October 23, 2006 at 5:14 PM
Anonymous
said...
How about "Anarchy in the UK"?
October 23, 2006 at 6:11 PM
Anonymous
said...
I fully expect 'Dave' to entertain the bus with a rendition of the latest from the Arctic Monkeys.
Oxford United are top of the Conference by 5 points so maybe some of that success may rub off.
BTW has DC got a soccer team he claims to "support" like TB claims to "support" Newcastle United?
For the singalong, other Pistols songs come to mind ie "Holidays in the Sun" (change "Berlin Wall" references to "Baghdad Green Zone") & "Pretty Vacant" ("Don't ask us what we're doing, 'cos we're not all there...you will always find us out to lunch").
54 comments:
What shall we do with the drunken LibDem leader?
What shall we do with the drunken LibDem leader?
What shall we do with the drunken LibDem leader?
Er-lie in the morning?
Put him in the spotlight with the cameras on him,
Put him in the spotlight with the cameras on him,
Put him in the spotlight with the cameras on him,
etc.
Gord Brown's Body Lies A Moulderin' in the Grave
(To the tune of "John Brown's Body"))
Heh!
To the tune of 'Donald, Where's Yer Troosers ?'
I’m from Kirkcaldy and Cowdenbeath
I look kinda deep but there’s nothing underneath
And they all shout out on Hampstead Heath
Hey Gordon where’s yer scruples?
Chorus
Let the wind blow high, let the wind blow low
I’ll bend with the wind where’er it blows,
And all the Lobby say - hello
Gordon, where’s yer scruples?
I’ve been Chancellor noo for many a year
But I’ve always slagged off Tony Blair
I brief against him withoot fear
And ye cannae do that with scruples!
(Chorus)
When I screwed up on the Benefits front
I didnae wish to look a ****
So I pushed Primarolo oot in front
For I havnae any scruples!
(Chorus)
Prime Minister I yurrn to be
Nuclear power? the top-up fee?
War in Iraq? they’re fine with me
I’ll support them without scruples!
(Chorus)
When I’m in Number 10 at last
Will I do what’s right for the wurrking class?
They can stick a Trident up their arse
If they think that I’ve got scruples!
(Chorus)
David Cameron announced the transformation of the Conservative party was now complete with the performance of the Conservatives new anthem for the next General Election:-
The people's flag is deepest red,
It shrouded oft our martyred dead,
And ere their limbs grew stiff and cold,
Their hearts blood dyed its every fold.
Then raise the scarlet standard high. (chorus)
Within its shade we'll live and die,
Though cowards flinch and traitors sneer,
We'll keep the red flag flying here.
Look round, the Frenchman loves its blaze,
The sturdy German chants its praise,
In Moscow's vaults its hymns are sung
Chicago swells the surging throng.
It waved above our infant might,
When all ahead seemed dark as night;
It witnessed many a deed and vow,
We must not change its colour now.
It well recalls the triumphs past,
It gives the hope of peace at last;
The banner bright, the symbol plain,
Of human right and human gain.
It suits today the weak and base,
Whose minds are fixed on pelf and place
To cringe before the rich man's frown,
And haul the sacred emblem down.
With heads uncovered swear we all
To bear it onward till we fall;
Come dungeons dark or gallows grim,
This song shall be our parting hymn.
nick derw - brilliant!
How about
Oh come all yea faithfull.......
How about that great Federation of Conservative Students song: "John Selwyn Gummer is a homosexual".
On the other hand, it's a bit insulting.
Gay people might complain.
Or that other great 1980s classic from the good old FCS (tune by Amazulu)..."Hang Nelson Mandela."
Sung to the tune of 'Don't lets be Beastly to the Germans'
Oh don't lets be beastly to the Hoodies
For Dave thinks they're really rather sweet
Oh don't lets be beastly to the Hoddies
You must smile when you see one in the street.
Oh we used to hang and flog
We would drown em in a bog
But now we've changed our stile
We'll ge em hugs and smile
Chorus
Oh don't lets be beastly to the hoodie etc
So condemn a little less
Understand a little more
Invite 'em all inside
As their kicking in your dooooor
ChorChors
us
Oh don't let's be beastly to the hoodie etc
We should hang 'em by the thumb
red hot pokers up the bumb
But Dave he says no
Only kindness we must shooooow
chorus
Oh etc
If you can't do a hug
You could try a little kiss
Or do you think dear Dave
is Just taking the Piiiiiiissss
Chorus
OH don't
A modest attemot, to be sung to the Beach Boys' "wouldn't it be nice"
Wouldnt it be nice if we were better
And not be in opposition for so long
And wouldnt it be nice to vote together
And send the Trots where they belong
We think Davy’s gonna make it all much better
If only he can hold the shadow cabinet together
Wouldnt it be nice if we had an agenda
Rather than just a vague tax-cut spenda
And now we’ve promised to be green and caring
We’ll nick the lib dems plans and give them an airing
Happy times together weve been spending
I wish that Bournemouth was neverending
Wouldnt it be nice
Maybe if we think and wish and hope and pray it might come true
With Davy as PM there would be nothing we couldnt do
We’d get some power
And oust the Labour shower
Wouldnt it be nice
You know it seems the more we talk about it
The more Francis Maude spouts some bullsh*it
But lets talk about it
Wouldnt it be nice
It has to be the Beatles "Nowhere Man".........
original lyrics will suffice.
To the tune of Golden Brown by the Stranglers, sing along now:
Gordon Brown, dour and no fun
Breaks his rules and his own sums
Throughout the City
A figure of pity
Always a frown with Gordon Brown
Up go deficits and taxes
As the Cyclops from Kirkaldy relaxes
Won’t talk to Blair
Thinks he’s unfair
Always a frown with Gordon Brown
Gordon Brown, Enron accounting
Over the years the deficit’s mounting
PFI deals
Granita meals
Always a frown with Gordon Brown
Always a frown
With Gordon Brown
Always a frown
With Gordon Brown
Ballad to the lib dems:
A yellow bird
A yellow bird
With a yellow bill
With a yellow bill
It landed on
It landed on
My window sill
My window sill
I lured it in
I lured it in
With a piece of bread
With a piece of bread
THEN I STAMPED ALL OVER ITS FUCKING HEAD
Stoooooooooooooooooooooooop
the bus I need a wee wee,
Stop the bus I need a wee wee,
Stop the bus I need a wee wee
And Soames is stuck in the bog.
(repeat ad infimitum, or until manservant frees portly figure from the pan)
Just a thought - one coach is going?
Does this mean all the MPs will be heading off in their jags and not joining in the jolly japes on the bus?
Boo. Bet George Osborne would have a note from his Mum saying he had to sit up front with the teachers to stop him feeling queasy.
I dont have any suggestions for a song , I just hope they are involved in a crash and all burn to death.
About 50 less leeches in this world.
Nick - shouldn't that be ...
"And Soames has blocked up the bog "
Ah yes, Paul Linford, I remember that song well.
And I still agree with the idea too.
Happy happy days they were...
Hello.
Is there anybody in there?
Just nod if you can hear me.
Is there anyone at home?
Come on, now.
I hear you’re feeling down.
Well I can ease your pain,
Get you on your feet again.
Relax.
I need some information first.
Just the basic facts:
Can you show me where it hurts?
There is no cash, my wallet’s bleeding.
I see no tax cuts on the horizon.
You are only coming through in waves.
Your lips move but I’ve no idea what you’re saying.
When I was a child it all was simple.
The left and right like two cartoons.
Now I don’t know which is which.
You won’t explain, ‘cos I won’t understand.
This is now how I am.
I have become comfortably dumb.
Ok.
Just a little windmill. [swish!]
Therell be no more --aaaaaahhhhh!
You will learn to love us quick.
Can you stand us?
I do believe its working. good.
That’ll keep you going just for now.
‘Til the other buggers go.
There is no plan, you are deceiving.
Just wishful thinking on the horizon.
That we’ll swap Tony’s grin for Dave’s.
Your lips move so I can tell that you’re lying.
When I was a child I caught a fleeting glimpse,
Out of the corner of my eye.
I turned to look but it was gone.
I cannot put my finger on it now.
The child is grown, the dream is gone.
I have become comfortably dumb.
Is this their reward for doing such a such a cracking job with the passes at Tory Party Conference this year? I bet all those people who had to stand in queues for hours will be impressed.
Song suggestion: 'Highway to Hell' or 'Road to No Where'.
Who wants to be a millionaire?
I am.
Facing the sun in my new shirt
that you embroidered in red yesterday,
I will wear it to my death
if I do not return to you...
Face to the Sun (Cara al Sol)
The old ones are the best.
THE ETON BOATING SONG -
appropriate in every way.............AND WE'RE ALL QUEERS TOGETHER................
how about, the classic millwall terraces song...
"nobody likes us, and we don't care."
Well as it will be nearly 3 hours in close comfort going there, likely some one will get murdered...but then cumming back, some one will probably get a shag...
as they are going to a football grounhd, i think we've got to stick to a football theme so....
"chim chim er neee,
chim chim er neee,
chim chim cherooo,
we are the bastards
who wear rosettes of blue."
or
(to the tune of yellow submarine)
"margaret thatcher's
dresses stink of piss, dresses stink of piss, dresses stink of piss."
To the tune of T Rex Children of the Revolution
Well you can thump and grind
If it's good for your mind
Well you can twist and shout
Let it all hang out
But you won't fool the children of the British nation
No you won't fool the children of the British nation
No no no
Well you can fly in a plane
To the arctic plain
You can be followed by a Rolls Royce
Pretending a bike is your choice
But you won’t fool….
To the sounds of the Spice Girls' "Spice Up Your Life":
When you're feeling sad and low
We will take you where you gotta go
Smiling, dancing, everything is free
All you need is Tory-tivity
Colours of the world (spice up your life!)
Every boy and every girl (spice up your life!)
People of the world (spice up your life!)
Aah...
Slam it to the Right (if youre having a good time)
Suck up to the Left (if you know that you feel fine)
Chicas to the front (huh huh) and go round
Slam it to the Right (if youre having a good time)
Suck up to the Left (if you know that you feel fine)
Chicas to the front (huh huh)
Hi, see ya, hold tight!
La la la la la la la la la
La la la la la la la
La la la la la la la la la
La la la la la la la
Yellow men in timbuktu
Vote for both me and you
Hoodie hugging, dancin' queen
Tribal redneck and all thats in between
Colours of the world (spice up your life!) [etc.]
Slam it to the Right (if youre having a good time) [etc.]
[Repeat]
oxford united?
bet they're all really excited
Robert Maxwell was chairman of Oxford United wasn't he? I can see the connection.
"Always look on the bright side of life ?"
Get in the practice now for when the electorate yet again rejects your la-la-land view of the world.
Surely it can be arranged for the driver to take a detour via Beachy Head first, jump out and the critical moment to leave the bus and it's hapless occupants to a happier fate than that which the country has in store for them.
Nick Drew's contribution was just so good I had to bring it to the Lib Dem Blogs audience too.
Top drawer cabaret old chap!
What about the old Steeler's Wheel number....
"Clowns to the Left of me,
Jokers to the Right,
Here I am,
Stuck in the middle with you"
Cameron's Lament to Blair
[aka Stuck in the Middle by Stealer's Wheels]
Yes I'm stuck in the middle with you,
And I'm wondering what it is I should do,
It's so hard to keep this smile from my face,
Losing control, yeah, I'm all over the place,
Clowns to the left of me, Jokers to the right,
Here I am, stuck in the middle with you.
etc
oh you beat me to it damn you.
Send in the clowns.
Spice up your life is gooooood.....
Lagwolf, I reckon that's why they got 2 hours on a bus to Oxford Utd. If they'd have extracted the digits quicker they might have got a proper jolly.
suggested song: Tina Turner's "we don't need another hero" they could even do mad max like re-enactments...
To quote the regular inhabitants of the ground:
'Chim chim-er-nee, chim chim-er-nee, chim chim charoo,
We are the muppets in yellow and blue'
we are tories
we are tories
no one likes us
we dont care
(to the tune of 'We are sailing')
Another humble offering, this one to the tune of Stairway to Heaven....
George Osborne MP, is talking to me
And he’s hoping to move to number eleven
And if he gets there he knows
That he’s going to be worse than Gordon
Woe oh oh oh oh oh
Yes, he’s going to be worse that Gordon
Theresa May’s got nice shoes but she’s singing the blues
Until she gets her bum on the woolsack
Leading from the back Cameron hears the sad news
That Billy Hague wants his old job back
Woe oh oh oh oh oh
Billy Vague wants his old job back
There's a feeling I get when I look to the west
And I worry for Gillan in Wales-
Plaid will lynch the poor dear as her seat aint in Cymru
At least Mundell’s seat is in Scotland
Woe oh oh oh oh oh
At least Mundell’s seat is in Scotland
And it's whispered that soon, if we all call the tune
Then young David will lead us to reason
And a new day will dawn for those who sing this song
And Millbank will echo with laughter
And it makes me wonder
If there's a Boris in your bedroom
Don't be alarmed now
It's just a boffing for the Au Pair
Yes there are two paths you can go by
but if your stuck behind Soames
There's still no room to overtake him
Your head is throbbing and it won't go because you don't know
Why Liam Fox is calling you to join him
Dear Tony can't you hear the horns blow and did you know
That we’re out to get you
And as we wind on down the road
With more loans than cash
There walks a lady we all know
Who shines white light and wants to show
That Margaret Thatcher isnt too old
She was tough, she was hard
It’s such a shame her time has past
When all are one and one is all
To be a tory and not to bore
Woe oh oh oh oh oh
We’ve all bought our peerages from Levy
Joe Taylor - Joe - my pleasure: post a recording of the song if your crew gets round to performing it.
NB I am NOT the Nick Drew who blogs as 'geekland' - just a humble punter. I'm sure you'll send up a smoke signal if you want to get in touch.
Guido - sorry to use you as a message board but old Joe here doesn't allow non-blogs to post chez lui. And he was nice (sort of)about you.
All ways look on the brightside of life......du da du da ...........
Don't be silly chumps and sit near the bearded butt fucker of CCHQ ........du da du da.... ...............
If you do you fall victim to an exhale of his terminal breath du da du da du do............
It stinks like shit and is secreted by the gay "faggot" gland in the back of his neck do da du do.
All ways look on the brightside of life....................
The end.
Mincing condutor maude on the trombone.
I have been trying to sing the one thats suppossed to be to the tune of Stairway To Heaven and its quite impossible, there are either too many or too few words on each line, and it is impossible to sing peerages from Levy in a Robert Plant-like way.
How about "Anarchy in the UK"?
I fully expect 'Dave' to entertain the bus with a rendition of the latest from the Arctic Monkeys.
Oxford United are top of the Conference by 5 points so maybe some of that success may rub off.
BTW has DC got a soccer team he claims to "support" like TB claims to "support" Newcastle United?
For the singalong, other Pistols songs come to mind ie "Holidays in the Sun" (change "Berlin Wall" references to "Baghdad Green Zone") & "Pretty Vacant" ("Don't ask us what we're doing, 'cos we're not all there...you will always find us out to lunch").
One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, Schlimiel, schlimazel, hasenpfeffer, incorporated.
We're gonna do it!
Give us any chance we'll take it,
Read us any rule, we'll break it.
We're gonna make our dreams come true.
Doin' it our way!
Nothing's gonna turn us back now,
Straight ahead and on the track now.
We're gonna make our dreams come true,
Doin' it our way!
There's nothing we won't try,
Never heard the word "impossible."
This time there's no stopping us,
We're gonna do it!
On your mark, get set, and go now,
Gotta dream and we just know now.
We're gonna make that dream come true.
And we'll do it our way, yes, our way,
Make all our dreams come true.
And we'll do it our way, yes, our way,
Make all our dreams come true
For me and you.
Don't want to worry but given Bournemouth does anyone know who booked the coach?
We're........
Rolling a gong on the chest of a slave...
"OH WHAT A GAY DAY"
we're new labour - and we know we are
we're new labour - and we know we are
(repeat about 100 hundered times)
Hows about Diamond Dave leading the singalong with that old fave, the Winkers Song (Misprint) by Ivor Biggun (AKA Doc Cox ex of Thats Life)
Can't they go to Swindon Town football 'stadium' instead? Then someone could drop a bomb on it and do the whole of the civilised world a favour...