Conference Totty Report : Hucknall Makes His Move

71 comments:

Anonymous said...

I actually vomited on my laptop.

Anonymous said...

Christ, it says something that even Beckett had to shut her eyes.

Anonymous said...

Thanks
I've just spat my drink all over the screen, imagine what their offspring would look like?
Shergar in a ginger wig.

Anonymous said...

Sickbag, quick, quick. Uuuuuurrrrrgggghhhhh. Too late.

Anonymous said...

Hucknall will shag anything with a pulse.

gunslinger said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Anonymous said...

Such cynicism towards young love does I'm afraid speak volumes of contemporary society.

We should not pour scorn on a fresh faced pair of sparkling nymphs attempting to navigate the wobbly stepping stones of loves young stream.

We should nurture and celebrate. We should sings symphonic paens of romance about Mr Hucknall and Miss Beckett.

I would do the same for Lord Snooty Macaroon and his young friend Osborne. Of course I would. I'm a modern dead blind Edwardian footballer.

gunslinger said...

...and I love the thought of coming home to you??

Anonymous said...

Sorry I am not a modern music follower, which one is Mick Hucknell?

Anonymous said...

"What's your favourite? A polo or a sugar cube?"

"Yes, I prefer a four berth to a six berth caravan anyday"

"No tongues please, I hardly know you"

"My, what big ears you have"

"I really fancy women who have no chin"

"Me and you are very similar. We are both useless.

Margaret "Mick, I hear you are hung like a horse"
Mick "At least I don't look like one"

Anonymous said...

"Thrill me" sings Hucknall "somethings got me started"
Ive had a play with Hazel Blears "red box" but you're "so beautiful" and for an old bird doing a good job of "holding back the years"

Stan Bull said...

Let me show you my caravan of love, Shergar....

Anonymous said...

Is that his hand at the back of her neck,pulling her skin tight?

Anonymous said...

Flock of seagullers is spot on.

dizzy said...

RIGHT | WRONG
----------------------------> above pic

Anonymous said...

Is that his hand at the back of her neck,pulling her skin tight?

No, I'm holding back the ears.

Guido Fawkes said...

** CLAPS **

See - see WIT YOU MONGS

Anonymous said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Anonymous said...

Better Dead than (Simply) Red

Anonymous said...

Don't bash Beckett. She's better at it than the girls at the Playboy Mansion. Because bunny's too tight to mention.

Guido Fawkes said...

Hitchens,

I was sitting on the loo this morning checking my Blackberry. You had posted a comment at 3.48am.

Both of us need to get an offline life.

Anonymous said...

Yeah 2 rite girl guide..

Make us laugh U BIG GAYS

U JOEY DEAKINS !

Anyone for bulldog ?

Anonymous said...

Just at that moment,Hucknall looks down at his 'phone to see a newly arrived text:'Mick,that woman you left the lab with--She's the escaped alien.'

Anonymous said...

Thora Hird to chap with a head like a burst cushion: ''I'm sorry, I've just come.''

Anonymous said...

Looks like the crowd's turning ugly...

Serf said...

Latest News

Mick Hucknall to release cover version of Housemartins "Caravan of Love".

Anonymous said...

Mick Hucknall,tapemeasure around neck,agrees to fit Mz Beckett for a coffin.Admits 'Can't do nuffink 'bout the poor cows' face though.'

Anonymous said...

Guido Fawkes Esq. said...
Hitchens,

I was sitting on the loo this morning checking my Blackberry. You had posted a comment at 3.48am.




Not me squire
definatley not me , i was tucked up in bed

Fitaloon said...

Thanks for that MIck, I'm seeing Stars now

Anonymous said...

When I snap my fingers you will wake up and believe that you're not going bald!

Anonymous said...

I recognise that picture! It's a still from a very early Star Trek, that one where the original Captain got kidnapped in order to mate with some girl who'd been rescued by some big brains in silver kaftans, etc, etc, YOU KNOW!!!

Anonymous said...

Its a bit like a role reversal of Catherine Zeta Jones and Michael Douglas....

http://www.ghostofhumphrey.blogspot.com

Anonymous said...

The hugely increased numbers of predatory men using the soporific effect of a Gordon Brown speech to make their move has been noticed at conference and beyond.

Anonymous said...

The Cage

Anonymous said...

After half an hour,Mzzzzz Beckett admitted defeat in the 'take but don't swallow tony's seed' contest.

Anonymous said...

Mzzzzzzzzz Beckett is flattered when Mick Hucknall is still prepared to tickle her Badger after being told about her incontinence pad.

Anonymous said...

never imagined Hucknall to be a right wing goose-stepper

who in their right minds would be seen at this goose steppin gathering

Anonymous said...

Cadaver meets ginger minger "I just love it when you stroke my pussy, its better than Leo giving me one in the caravan"

Anonymous said...

The Mummy returns

Julian said...

God, talk about 'money's too tight to mention' - he'd have to be losing royalties like Michael Jackson to think of doing that ...

Anonymous said...

'monies too tight to mention'--'Tis in the Labour Party.Do you think the poor cow was raffled?What did she go for?Do you think Hucknall saw something of himself in her?

Anonymous said...

Which one is the granny?

Was this Barry Bucknall a member of a band or did he do DIY?

Why is he leering at a hideous old hag?

I can't see the hands. Where are the hands.

Anonymous said...

It was me, Guido, the real Peter Hitchens, but I have stopped using the name as it was confusing people.

Anonymous said...

he is giving her a good goosing

Anonymous said...

The famous Mick Hucknall proudly shows off his winning entry in the Labour Conference's 'Paint A Balloon'contest.

Anonymous said...

"OBE"
"Peerage?"
"Knighthood, tops"
"OK, I'll shag you."

Anonymous said...

Somebody tell me how to erase a post?I want to put my own name to the balloon one.

Anonymous said...

The problem of SparrowHawks in the hall was solved when the PM suggested the introduction of Margaret Beckett and Mick Hucknall.

Anonymous said...

lord , the thought that guido reads our postings on the crapper .
I have to admit my life is a bit shit at the moment but posting at 3:48 to some bloke taking a dump???

Back to Hucknell

Anonymous said...

Mick Hucknall's ventriloquism act foundered when conference members found the dummy 'nauseating' and 'very frightening.'

Anonymous said...

What happened to the facial hair?

Anonymous said...

I can't think of anything witty, so I just wanted to say I fucking hate Mick Hucknell!!! So I hope him and the toad faced one are happy together.

Julian said...

Apropos the earlier 'holding back the ears' comment, how disgusting is it to be suggesting, "Granny's Too Tight To Mention"?

Anonymous said...

Judith, you might be right, but there's also a strong resemblance to Balok from The Corbomite Maneuver (http://www.bbc.co.uk/cult/st/gallery/tos1/tosbalok.shtml)

Anonymous said...

Oh my God! No one's touched me there since I was a young gel, in 1938! I lurve you!!!

Anonymous said...

'I'll put it in your hand,love.Then you tell me what it is.'

Anonymous said...

Mzzzz Beckett was helped by a gallant Mick Hucknall,when having applied her pancake makeup,someone unfortunately tried to fry her.

Anonymous said...

BATTER HER -- you mong

Anonymous said...

That is one fucking horrible picture...if it was a animated gif instead of a jpeg it would be a video nasty and you would be arrested.

Both of those fuckers are ugly enough for two heads.

Anonymous said...

But maybe it's more like Spock's Brain, where some weird women removed his grey matter for nefarious porpoises ... help, Doctor, help......

Anonymous said...

I Know some of your postings are a bit strong sometimes Guido. However, I'm suprised at you stooping so low and publishing obscene photos like this one. I am normally pretty broadminded but seeing this has turned me a little bit queezy.

Anonymous said...

The only reason I'm posting this is that the main page says that this picture has 69 comments. That's not a number I want to think about in connection with that snap. Please bring this to a nice round 70, quickly!

Anonymous said...

Bucket, quick arrrghhhhhhhhhhh

Anonymous said...

"Don't worry, dear; it always stings a bit the first time. We'll just tell everyone you're a hand puppet and nobody will say a word."

Anonymous said...

A member of a Native American delegation to Conference unexpectedly gave birth,attended by two well-known and thrilled Party members.The child was later named 'Two Dogs Sniffing.'

Anonymous said...

The problem with that picture is that I'm not sure which one has the bigger penis

Anonymous said...

"Why, that's so amazing: I enjoy Fisking too."

Anonymous said...

http://www.skyshowbizpanel.com/hotornot/teaser.php
you poor lot xx

Anonymous said...

http://www.manchestereveningnews.co.uk/entertainment/music/s/224/224135_its_party_time_for_mick_and_gabriella.html

xxx

Anonymous said...

look into the furture with hope ppl. not all is lost to you yet. if you know to stop your venom from overshooting

Anonymous said...

It bewilders me that people keep ranting about Mick Hucknall's red hair. Hasn't anyone noticed that it looks like wig made out of a scabious poodle knocked over by a four-wheel drive, regardless of its colour? Imagine him looking exactly the same as he does now, except with a different hair colour. He would still burn your eyes out with ugliness. It isn't just the dead dog on his head, it's his sodding face. IT'S SO BLOODY ROUND. And his expression is so awfully dumb.

On a more positive side, I do hope modern technology can help them produce some offspring. It would take humanity to a whole new level.